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Electric Dreams

Volume 2 Issue #14

30 November 1995


Electric Dreams on Web:

-- Send dreams and comments on dream to:

Bob Krumhansl <>.

--Send general comments, replies and articles to:

Richard Wilkerson: <>

--For back issues and other access see




Editors' Notes: Dick and Bob

DreamSharing On Internet - >Update and

Special Group coming! Meet here for Groups

Bob's Dream site of the Month


Commentary on Dream Journeys (EDV2N13) & Flare dreams by Jay (951031)

Commentary on Island Dreams by Jay (951111)

Commentary on Dream Line Commentary by Island (951102)

Commentary on Dream Journeys- Spiritual Transformation Dreams by Island (951102) - See Island Collection I


DreamStudio Schedule! Donna Campos

Article: A Dream's Worth by John Suler

Cyber Update: SleepNet Web site

Special Series: Dreamjourneys: Dreams of Spiritual Transformation Part II

by Taylor Esta Kingsley

!!!! Special Supplement !!!!

Global Dreaming News for November, 1996

Dream Network Journal Update and information

Dream Poems:

"Nightmares Leave Messes" by Brandi McElhatten

"Dreams" by Stephanie Grusch

Index To Dreams & Dream Commentary Sequence for EDv2n14

(Following the title is the author and the date of the dream/commentary or submission - in the format of Year-Month-Date/YYMMDD)


Commentary on "Oaxican Animals" by Island (951102)

Commentary on "Guitar Shop Friend" (Taodreams) by Island (951102)

Commentary on "Orca Ying-Yang" (Lamb of DEC 1993) by Island (951102)


Dream: "Determined To Return To School" by Blair (940701)

Commentary on "Determined To Return To School" by Blair (951101)

Dream: "Now It's Dark" by Flare (951101)

Dream: "Night Of 3 Stars" by Zoom (951104)

Commentary on "Night of 3 Stars" by Narcissus (951106)

Commentary on Night of 3 Stars" by Flare (951106)

Dream: "He's Really, Really Mad At Me" by Flare (951114)

Dream: "He's Really, Really Mad At Me"-Correction by Flare

Commentary: "He's Really, Really Mad At Me" by Narcissius (951115)

Dream: "The Dark Side of The Moon" by Flare (951117)

Commentary on "The Dark Side of The Moon" by Flare (951117)

Dream: "The Knock On The Door" by Abraxas (951119)

Dream: "The Gopher In The Homeroom" by Abraxas (951119)

Dream: "The Woman and The Turk" by Abraxas (951119)

ISLAND COLLECTION I (Dreams of Christ):

Introduction: Comments on EDv2n13 Dream Journeys article

Dream: "Healed On A Bed, Rising, Once Grounded" by Island's Friend (8304XX) with comments by Island (951102)

Dream: "Indians Masked As Fish Are Missed During Target Practice In Water" by Island (8203XX)

Dream: "A 20th Century Christ Crucified In The Mid-West" by Island (8505XX)

Dream: "In The Deeps Of Outer Space, I Free Myself From A Snake" by Island (8709XX)

Dream: "Climbing, Climbing, Climbing, Crash" by Island (8803XX)

Dream: "My Father Introduces The Astrologer" by Island (880726)

Dream: "The Power Of Evil" by Island (8809XX)

Dream: "Is It A Man, Is It An Angel, Is It Christ Crucified?" by Island (9012XX)

Dream: "An Embarrassing Proclamation From Someone Who Never Gives Up" by Island (9107XX)

Dream: "The Problem Of How To Feed 4509 Black Men On The Spur Of The Moment" by Island (9108XX)

Dream: "Will The Authentic Christ Please Stand Up?" (9110XX)

Dream: "A Gift Of Two Tiny Miniatures" by Island (9201XX)


Dream: "I'm With The Band" by Nutcracker (951022)

Dream: "Death By Plastic Wrap by Nutcracker (951022)

Dream: "Chickbunnies by Nutcraker (951022)

Dream: "Computers R Us by Nutcracker (951024)

Dream: "Cold As Stone by Nutcracker (951024)

Dream: "The Two Liz's by Nutcracker (951025)

Dream: "Deja Vu by Nutcracker (951031)

Dream: "If I Had A Hammer (951101)

Dream: "The Boy's Club by Nutcracker (951102)

Dream: "Noise, Noise, Noise by Nutcracker (951102)

Dream: "Dream Students by Nutcracker (951102)

Dream: "Pez Head" by Nutcracker (951106)

Dream: "Save It To The Hard Drive" by Nutcracker (951106)

Dream: "Darwin's Theory" by Nutcracker (951107)

Dream: "Beatles Song: Coke Above My Head" by Nutcracker (951107)

Dream: "Screwed Again!" by Nutcracker (951108)

Dream: "Evil Incarnate" by Nutcracker (951109)

Dream: "What Does It Mean?" by Nutcracker (951109)


Access Information to Electric Dreams


Editors' Notes and Day Residue


There is a commercial postcard floating around now from the dream comic artist, Rick Veitch, which has some rigid structures and a man's face morphed and coming out of them, the caption reads "Walls mean nothing to dreamworkers." I think that's the image I have of our community too. We are like a swarm transecting the net, morphing into places that no one else goes and playing with materials that are somewhere between dangerous and ludicrous. And so our story continues.

First, Taylor Kingsley continues to reveal some of the ideas that she has been working on for her new book in Dreams of Spiritual Transformation. Find your transformational dreams and join her in the second part of her series on Dreamjourneys.

By the way, I want to apologize to Taylor for listing her last issue as "he"! It's sad that such unconscious assumptions linger in my habits, but I would have appreciated the column no matter who wrote it, so forward we go- Sorry Taylor!

John Suler, that multi-talented teacher stops by with and interesting article on just how little dream material we really need to make meaningful statements about the dreamer.

Tee-shirt Saga:

Well, the Electric Dreams Tee shirt art is done, but they only transfer onto white tee shirts. So I'm going to be sending the logo and you can iron it on your favorite white tee-shirt. Thanks to Jay Vinton for the funds for finishing this project and his voluntary subscription donation!

Dreamsharing in email groups:

If your interested in learning dream sharing on the net in small groups, or just want to get in there and try some, we are about to embark on a special group project, DreamWheel 5. If you are interested in joining this historic experiment, drop me a line if you are interested at

Electric Dreams Web Page

Matthew Parry, who donates and maintains the ED web site has separated out the dreams sent in by people after Jerry Garcia's Death and has a graphic now heading the page that brought me to tears... again.

And finally, Bob is here to tell you about what we do best, sharing our dreams... Richard

Thanksgiving Thoughts by Bob Krumhansl

Following shortly will be the shared dreams and dream commentary of those active participants in the ongoing Electric Dreams experience. In honor of the Thanksgiving Holiday just passed, I would like to take this moment to thank the contributors of Dreams and Commentaries for their efforts and willingness to share with the Electric Dreams community their dreams and ideas. I also thank the reader - yes you! - for taking the time to look into this special world.

Special thanks to Flare and Nutcracker for giving us a glimpse of a sequence of dreams (one chronological and one thematic). I am of the opinion that each and every dream is a potential "gold mine" of wisdom and insight. A series of dreams or set of dreams bonded by the timeframe of their recollection or commonality of theme offers an even greater opportunity for insight into the dreamer and issues of importance to the dreamer and through the magic of sharing insight into ourselves.

Thanks also to the "Dreamer within" all of us, however it/he/she may be called, and the ability to recall dreams -the images they display and stories they tell. A world of wonder and amazement are just beneath the surface of our everyday lives as those who pay attention to their dreams know deep within.

Enjoy Electric Dreams V2 N14 !!




Check out which lists Tim Hobbs dreams of the following kind:

1. Clairvoyant, Clairaudient, Precognitive

2. Numinous dreams of Spiritual Figures

3. Dreams of Water and Fire

4. Catastrophe Dreams

5. Apocalyptic and Eschatological

6. Resurrection and Transformation

7. Numerical Sequences

8. Unknown Technologies

9. Psychic Attack or unpleasant OBE visitations

10. Dreams of the Catholic Church

11. Reluctant Hero

12. Astronomical (Meteors, Stars, etc...)

13. Dreams that end in songs

All dream comments are by Thos J. Jones.

Tim's dream page is just one of the many excellent sites off of his Web Page which foucuses on Spiritual, Pychic and Internet tool themes.

Tim pointed out the following Dream Resources in a recent posting on Alt.Dreams:

Freud and Jung Dream Interpretation Primer by Duncan Barford

and some examples of numinous, clairvoyant, and precognitive dreams with comments on some from a mostly Jungian viewpoint by Thos J. Jones


You can register dreams you think may be precognitive here

Dreams and Dream Interpretation

ARE [Edgar Cayce] a brief article on dreams

Holocom: dreams!

Dreams FAQ [this group]

Electric Dreams FAQ [ a zine]

Electric Dreams archive [a collection]


Until next issue: Hasta La Vista!

Bob K.





1) Date: 95-10-31 21:49:03 EST

From: JAY

hi guys,

well, i just finished reading e.d. 2.13. thank you both for another wonderful issue.

i especially liked the dreamjourneys article by taylor kingsley. i would explain/interpret these integretive dreams in a less

supernatural manner, but agreed with much of it anyhow. seems like we have seen some of this kind of dream in electric dreams. in particular, i have been impressed and moved by the apparent

progression in the dreams submitted by flare, culminating in her

'changing the unchangable' dream in e.d. 2.13.

by the way, the access info at the end of e.d. 2.13 still says to

send dreams and comments to richard, even though you changed the

instructions up front to say bobk.

keep on dreamin,

2) Subj: islands 11/02 submission for e.d. 2.14

Date: 95-11-11 13:49:04 EST

From: JAY

hi island,

i just finished reading your 11/02 submission for e.d. 2.14.

i really liked your christ series of dreams.

for another fish dream similar to yours, see dream network vol 14

numbers 1&2 (a combined issue) pg 46, 'the lake of goldfish'.

3) Dream Line Issue Comment by Island

A synchronistic happening for us when the OJ Simpson trial began: my husband and myself were listening to Dostoevsky's "The Brothers Karamazov" on tape, a great work about an innocent man brought to trial and sentenced for a murder he did not commit, though all evidence pointed to the contrary. I made a choice then not to assimilate anything about the trial, as an experiment, so that when the time came and I was privy to the "happenings" by yet another synchronistic revelation, I would have a chance then to see how I really felt about the matter.

That time came. We went to eat in an Indian restaurant and a huge TV faced us as we ate. One of OJ's trial attorneys was summing things up for the jury. I listened closely for some time and realized in those moments that, no matter whether OJ was guilty or not, I would not have delivered the verdict of guilty. That attorney was able to plant a seed of doubt within me for those few minutes. I knew that I would rather a guilty man go free than an innocent man be convicted. Later that week, some TV show ran an hour on the life of OJ. Assimilating a tad more, what snapped into the forefront was a nightmare that all of America had been riveted to see played out: why? It would be an interesting experiment to have the event staged as a dream/nightmare, with commentary, to learn if any meaningful associations would evolve.

4) A Dreamer's Response to Taylor Etta Kingsley's "Dream Journeys: Dreams of Spiritual Transformation" (ED:2_13) by Island

I found Kingsley's work fascinating and for the most part agree wholeheartedly about the necessity of distinction. But I don't know if what Kingsley has written is true for me, though it may be a wonderful starting point. From my own reference point, let me share a few examples:

100 + dreams precognitive over a 9-year period of dreams of a man that I actually met and married; precognitive dreams of brother's murder; precognitive dream of mass murder approximately 12 hours before it happened; dreams of the deceased; talking to Christ after descending to the depths of the ocean. My original starting point in the dream? Outer space. More dreams seem actually "spiritual" by this definition than psychological, simply because the person that I am who lives day to day had information/experience provided from somewhere? Someone? that would otherwise have remained an unknown. It's just that the 20th century has many closed gestalts, if you will, around many areas: dreams as "spiritual" being one.

What happens is I see dreams as "spiritual" in retrospect, but I am so conditioned to view them as psychological as I remember them that it is more convenient to think of them in those terms, rather than in "spiritual" terms. Therefore, my focus is on learning the language then, when God(dess) speaks, I can truly listen. Ultimately, all dreams may be spiritual because all dreams may ultimately provide information/experience that would remain forever an unknown unless we can read the signs. But our filters need a lot of cleansing, and we need to learn this for the most part alien language of dreams. To illustrate my perspective, what follows is a discussion of a sequence of dreams of Christ I had over a period of years. (See ISLAND COLLECTION I - Editor)




The Dream Studio is a live online discussion group in Compuserve's New Age Forum. Hosted by Donna LoCicero Campos and Paul TMB, the Dream Studio meets each Monday night at 10:00pm EDT and 7:00pm PDT and looks at a variety of dream-related topics.

December schedule:

Monday, Dec. 4: Dreams of the Big Wall Climbers with Puntalejos

--It often takes people scaling big walls such as El Capitan in Yosemite several days --and nights before they get to the top. What kind of dreams do climbers sleeping on --rock ledges have? (also featured in Electric Dreams, Sept. '95, Volume 2, Issue 11)

Monday, Dec. 11: Dreams and Wishes

--A fun lesson in dream incubation with dreamer Kim Healy

Monday, Dec. 18: Dreams of Birth and Pregnancy

--Come share and explore these fascinating dreams with us!

For more information, contact Donna LoCicero Campos at


A Dream's Worth

by John Suler


A picture is worth a thousand words. You've heard it so many times that it sounds trite. But a picture really IS worth a thousand words. And if a dream is a very special kind of picture, how much is IT worth? Maybe more? What

about very simple pictures and very simple dreams? No doubt they're worth a little bit less than complex, elaborate ones.

Or are they?

In my psychotherapy course one day, I presented my undergraduate students with these questions. "Here's a very simple dream from a psychotherapy client I worked with years ago. I won't tell you anything about the client. I'll just tell you his dream, and then lets see what we can discover about him by exploring it...... O.K? Here's the dream:" "I was wearing a white shirt and a purple tie."

The students just stare at me, expecting more to come. "No," I explain, "that's it. That's the dream. Now let's start to explore it."

I then lead them through a group process of free associating to the dream (much like I describe on the Working and Playing with Dreams Page on WWW).

"Just let your imagination go. Take every element of the dream and just let your mind wander on it. Whatever comes to mind. Don't censor anything, that's important. There is no right or wrong. It can be a fun, playful

exercise - although the results sometimes may be serious and powerful. Freud thought that free association bypasses the defenses of rational, logical thinking and unlocks deeper links within the unconscious. It opens one up to fantasy, symbolism, and emotion - the very place from which dreams spring."

Here is a list of some of the associations the students come up with. For the purpose of this article I've organized them somewhat, whereas during the actual exercise the ideas surface in a much more freewheeling stream of consciousness:

PURPLE .... royalty, bruises, choking, holding one's breath, grief, a combination of blue and pink, goes well with black, The Color of Purple

TIE .... formal attire, going to work, phallic symbol, tied up, being tied to something, chokes the neck, confining

PURPLE TIE .... unconventional, stands out, rebellious, showing off

WHITE .... clean, pure, unstained, "good," light .

SHIRT .... the top part, covered up, tucked in, stuffed shirt, where are the pants?

WHITE SHIRT.... conventional, boring, going to work, going to church, corporate America,

WHITE SHIRT AND PURPLE TIE.... unusual combination, contradictory combination, very unconventional, tie really stands out.

DEPLETION?.... there's nobody else in the dream, it's so static, there's nothing happening, where are the feelings?

After we finish this free associating, I then describe the client to the class.

At the time Dan had the dream, he was 23 years old. I would describe him as a quiet, held-back person who was very confined (the tie) in how he talked, behaved, and felt towards others. Put bluntly, people found him rather boring to be with (white shirt). His emotional and interpersonal life were choked (the tie).

He had almost no friends and felt little connection to his family (the tie again). Other than going to his tedious job (white shirt) as a low level technician for a computer company, essentially nothing was happening in his static, uneventful life (depletion).

Dan was also very limited in understanding anything but the most surface, top-level (shirt) characteristics of his personality. Although outwardly conventional in how he dressed and acted at his job (white shirt), secretly

he felt rebellious against authority (purple tie on white shirt) and generally superior (purple) to most people. He liked to think of himself as a political activist who firmly believed in the rights of abused (purple) people and felt more tied to them than anyone else. Comparing outside to inside, he was a bit of a contradiction (white shirt on purple tie).

But none of these issues is what consciously drove him to therapy. What he most desperately needed to discuss and resolve was the fact that he was homosexual (purple tie). Yet he didn't know whether he wanted to come out of

the closet or not (the tie). Part of him wanted to let everyone know, to even show off and parade the fact that he was gay (purple tie on white shirt), to escape the feeling that his identity was being restrained and choked (more tie). His rebellious, unconventional side liked that idea. He sometimes did indeed bravely experiment with revealing his gay identity by wearing a purple

triangle, which to him symbolized being homosexual (a combination of pink and blue).

But another side of him (purple tie versus white shirt) was afraid to come out. He sometimes felt dirty, tainted, sick, for being gay. That part of him wanted to be somehow cleansed and redeemed (white shirt). Part of the problem was that sex in general was a very unpleasant issue for him. When he was young he had had surgery on his genitals. He still felt insecure and "bruised" (purple) down there. He was so conflicted about sex that I sometimes wondered if he had been sexually abused as a child (purple tie?, suffocating tie?).

A dream, even a simple one, is worth at least a thousand words. Freud thought that there was no limit to how much you could analyze a dream. You can always go further and further into the symbols, the links of associations, the memories that generate a dream. At some deep unconscious

level, any dream fans out into the infinite horizon of emotion and thought that constitute the individual psyche... that even transcends the individual psyche and constitutes us all. JS


John Suler is Professor of Psychology at Rider University and practices clinical psychology in Bucks County, PA. He has published a variety of articles on creativity, psychotherapy, and eastern philosophy.

His Working and Playing with Dreams Page on WWW is part of his Teaching Clinical Psychology site -


SleepNet - a Resource for All Sleepers and Dreamers


Everything you want to know about sleep but are too tired to ask. Most of this information is directly quoted from the web site - Richard.

The information in this document is not intended as medical advise. If you have questions concerning any of the issues in this document you may want to seek the advice of a physician.

One objective of the SleepNet is to link all known sleep information on the internet together at one location for easy access. Most answers to questions brought up by this homepage can be found on one of the links. Please check links before e-mailing questions to the sandman.

Some Major Linked Areas:

Sleepnet Introduction

Sleep Disorders

Links to Other Sites (23)

Support Groups

The School of Sleep Medicine

National Center For Sleep Disorders Research

Infants and Aging (coming) see links

Sleep Deprivation (coming) see links

Tips for a poor sleeper (coming) see links

Links to Other Sleep Information sites:

Do's and Dont's for Poor Sleepers

The Sleep Medicine Home Page a well documented home page

Stanford University Center for Nacolepsy

Childrens Sleep Problems

Sleep Changes and Sleep Pathology in the Elderly

SNORE Central

Cure Narcolepsy Now

Sleep Solutions Homepage

FAQ's about Coffee and Caffeine

Brain Information Service

OSA and Children

Medline reviews of melatonin

Chronic Fatigue Syndrome

Chronic Fatigue Syndrome FAQ's

Big Folks Health FAQ's

MedWeb:Adams Guide to Medical Resources on the Internet

Sleep Disorders

Access to Sleep Psychology>

Behavioral Biology - Sleep and Performance>

Sleep Apnea>

NIH - National Center on Sleep Disorders Research>

INSOMNIA and other Sleep Problems>

NASA Fatigue Countermeasures Program



Dreams of Spiritual Transformation II

by Taylor Esta Kingsley c 1995


(An exerpt from Electric Dreams vol 2 #13, Part I)

"Some say that gleams of a remoter world

Visit the soul in sleep."

- Shelley, Mont Blanc.

I am currently researching and studying dreams of special spiritual significance, which I call dreamjourneys. This research will be published in article and book form. Consider this column a "sneak preview" - and an essential part of this research process. I'm an avid DJ'er (dreamjourneyer), as well as LDer (lucid dreamer), for over 25 years.

In addition to being a dreamjourneyer and researcher, I am a shaman. I work as a spiritual catalyst, counselor and teacher, and have guided individuals and groups in ritual, chant, meditation, and sacred drumming for spiritual trance-formation for many years. I am also coauthor of "Passion Play!," the world's first tantric sensual board game for lovers, and a published poet and journalist.

My own shamanic initiation began with a dream, which I will share with you at some point.

I invite you to share your comments and questions inspired by this column, as well as your personal dreamjourneys. You are also cordially welcome to provide suggestions on what you'd like to see addressed in this

column. You can e-mail me at: If you e-mail me a dream, let me know if I may use it in my other published work on dreams. I cannot compensate you in any way, but I promise to credit you if you so desire.


Part II:

Dream #4

A man dreams of being in a cave. The cave is dark and cool, but feels safe.

In the cave appears a bear.

The bear says, "I am with you always. I am here to guide you. This is your safe place of wisdom. Come here whenever you wish to find me. I am always with you and within you." The man wakes.

Psychoanalytic-symbolic dream analysis would say the cave represents his subconscious. The bear is a father figure (or perhaps, mother figure) that represents his actual parent. The dreamer would be advised to consider: What part of you is the bear? What do you feel about bears? What do you feel about your mother and father, and how is this like your feelings or experiences with bears? Possibly it would be seen as wish fulfillment that the man's mother or father is always with him. (They are actually both deceased.) Freudian analysis might even add some sexual aspect, like, the cave is a vagina. The bear is a phallic symbol for masculine virility. The bear inside the cave is intercourse, which is integral to the man's internal balance and harmony. He needs to resolve his issues with his parents to improve his sex life. Oedipal issues would be raised.

Spiritual analysis would be much simpler:

The bear is a totem for the dreamer. The message was literal. When he goes in his mind back to that cave, he can contact Bear again for guidance. He should heed those messages.

Clearly, there is a world of difference between these interpretations. The world of spirit.

Some Jungian therapists would also recognize this, even though they would still see the bear as an archetype of part of the man himself. It doesn't really matter whether you think of it as inner or outer, the

important thing is to validate the validity of the message and the messenger as real and significant. To apply symbols to this dream obviously obfuscates its beautiful, powerful message of first contact from Bear.

Once the dreamer recognized the dream as a spiritual message, and Bear as one of his guides, he honored and increased his connection with Bear and Bear qualities in himself: ferocious strength with loving

gentleness. He feels he has his masculine-feminine energies in better balance and points to greater peace and confidence in himself.

OK, now here's a challenge for you. Here comes a dream loaded with religious symbolism, that I invite you to interpret from any perspective you like. I'm providing relevant background on the dreamer to assist. Next column, we'll look at some of your interpretations. Then we'll see what happened in the dreamer's life after this dream, and what she had to say about the dream's meaning. And other mysteries will be revealed, like:

Whose picture was on the candle?

Background: The dream took place in August 1994. The woman having the dream has been actively increasing the spiritual focus in her life for about 5 years, studying, teaching and practicing. She was raised Jewish,

does not practice Judaism at the time of the dream, but has an eclectic, growing spiritual life focused on Goddess worship, also including shamanic, Hindu, Buddhist, Native American and animist traditions. Four years earlier, she had had a related dreamjourney in which her "soul was lost, in another place, a creepy version of my bedroom as a child. I couldn't get back. I started praying like crazy, to everyone I could think of. When I said 'Jesus,' I saw Jesus appear at the foot of my childhood bed, smiling, holding out his hands. I jumped toward him, into him, and I woke up back in my bed in Florida, where my body was." She credits Jesus with bringing her back to her body, to this plane, but is not a Christian per se. "Hecate," referred to in the dream, was a Greek goddess of the underworld, the goddess of witches, crossroads, the moon, and night. She is not generally considered an evil figure by modern Goddess scholars and worshippers, but is more of a powerful Crone.

Dreams #5 & #6

The night before I had this dream, I lit a white candle I had purchased months ago at a ritual supply store. I didn't pay attention to the figure on the picture around the candle, not consciously, and I don't know why I

lit that particular one that night, finally. I don't usually light any candle at all. But I did.

When the dream starts, I'm in an elevator. There are a lot of people in the elevator with me, including a friend of mine, Jane, who moved to San Diego six months ago. I keep pushing "8" because I know we're supposed to get off

at the eighth floor. But the elevator won't stop. It's going down. It keeps going faster and faster, now we're falling, shooting downward. The indicator shows that we've even gone below the basement, just farther down,

down. I'm scared. I'm pushing the stop button, pulling a lever, nothing works.

Suddenly the elevator opens between floors. I can see a brick wall in front of us, then the elevator falls a little more down and there's an opening.

But it's filled with demons! People with skull heads, dripping with blood, and they're flying into the elevator! Attacking me and Jane. I'm trying to defend her, but it's not working. Suddenly an evil woman appears. She reminds me of Hecate, but it's like an evil anti-Hecate. She has a big nose. She's cackling at me, she's laughing and saying weird things like "My nose knows! Ahahaha!" I'm afraid, then I try to pull off her nose. It comes off and blood shoots off, but she just laughs and another nose grows back.

Now the demons are coming at me again. I feel cornered in the elevator, so I decide to run past them into the dark void beyond. I'm running and they're chasing me. I'm out of breath and feel like they're gonna get me. I come to a chamber. In the chamber is the anti-Hecate! There is some kind of satanic ritual going on, she's being worshipped. I feel totally powerless.

I can't escape. They notice me and she says, suddenly nice, trying to be inviting, "Why don't you join us? We can give you whatever you want! Power! Money!" and so on. She makes me promises. I keep shouting "No! No!" and

putting my arms in front of myself to keep her away from me. She keeps coming closer and making these promises. I start to run again. I wake up.

But when I wake up, I'm not in my bedroom in California. I'm in that creepy room again - the creepy childhood bed! I feel totally afraid. I say to myself, "OK, this is just a dream. I can will myself to wake up.

WAKE UP!!!" But I'm still there! I can feel really negative energies around me, tho' I don't see them. I know I'm lost. My soul is lost. I'm terrified, and don't know what to do. Just then, I start to see a white light glowing in the room. I dive into the white light!

Whew! That saved me. I finally woke up where I was supposed to be, in my "real" bed in California, in my body. When I opened my eyes, I was looking straight into the candle, which was still burning next to my bed. I

knew I had just been somewhere else, that I had almost died, really. I was shaken, but so relieved to be back. I realized this was no ordinary dream.

I felt healing light all around me, shimmering, could actually see it, the whole room was glowing with good power. I knew what I had to do, even though I was afraid. I prayed and gathered my guides around me. I said over

and over "Circle of Power Surrounds Me."

When I felt I was strong enough, I went back into the dream! Very lucidly, although I don't remember too many details about this part. I went back to the ritual chamber and confronted the anti-Hecate and her demons. I told them something like this: "Nothing you can ever say or do will EVER get me to join your side. I use my power for good, only. Now go away! Or I will destroy you." I was growing larger and larger, glowing. I just know that I won. I woke up again, feeling totally empowered and victorious, blissful, safe and grateful to whoever/whatever was helping me. I fell back into

normal sleep.

My life has never been the same, since that dream, especially because of what happened next...

So whatdya think? What did all this mean?

Differences Between Dreamjourneys and Lucid Dreams

One of the most common questions dreamers ask me is "What's the difference between a dreamjourney and a lucid dream? Aren't they just the same?" There are similarities, but they are not the same.

You may have noticed that in the above six dreamjourneys, only the second dream in the last series (in which the dreamer chooses to return to the dream) was lucid. The others were not.

Myself, in an average month, I have about 6 lucid dreams (LDs) and 7 or 8 dreamjourneys (DJs). Some dreams fall into both categories. As you know, a lucid dream is a dream in which the dreamer is conscious and aware

that s/he is dreaming. Dr. Stephen LaBerge has pioneered the field of lucid dreams in our culture, scientifically proving their existence and bringing them to the public awareness, as well as helping thousands have more

lucidity in their dreams. Dr. KeithHearne also deserves mention for his lucid dream research, as do others.

Lucidity is a very useful skill, and I wholeheartedly support this work and recommend Dr. LaBerge's books to anyone wishing to understand and develop lucid dreams. I am very glad his work has gained popular acceptance and helped thousands in their lives, from healing to creative problem solving to overcoming nightmares.

The recognition and understanding of dreamjourneys is not the same as that of lucid dreams, although they are related. Dreamjourneys are yet another piece of the puzzle toward understanding our dreams and gaining wisdom therein which we can apply in our waking lives.

As the concept of dreamjourneys and spiritual dreams in general is not yet commonly accepted or valued in our culture, but lucid dreaming is a popular interest, I believe it would be helpful to explain the differences

and similarities between these types of dreams.

Similarities Between LDs and DJs

1. FEEL REAL. Both lucid dreams and dreamjourneys feel more "real" to the dreamer.

2. TRANSFORMATIONAL. Both LDs and DJs have great power to transform the dreamer's waking life, empower him/her, help eliminate blocks preventing success, increase creativity, receive solutions to problems, and overcome


3. EXPERIENCES BEYOND WAKING LIFE. In lucid dreams as well as dreamjourneys, the dreamer can experience things s/he could never experience in waking life, e.g. flying, walking through walls, talking to the deceased, becoming an animal or another person, breathing under water,

and so on.

Dreamjourneys do change scenes, and characters can still blend together and shift, as in lucid and other dreams.

4. MOST DREAMSIGNS STILL USEFUL TO GAIN LUCIDITY. Most dreamsigns presented in LaBerge's "Exploring the World of Lucid Dreaming" still apply in a dreamjourney, and can help the dreamer gain lucidity within a dreamjourney:

* FEELINGS: You may feel such intense bliss and wisdom, such a connection with everything in the universe, such as you have never felt when awake.

* ACTIONS: You may be able to do things normally impossible in the physical waking world, such as fly, leave your body, breathe under water, speak a foreign language. Or another dream character may do something "impossible." A common example of this is animals, trees, rocks that talk, or change form.

* FORM: You may appear as another race, age, gender, species. You may see angels, deities or other spiritual beings you do not see when awake. You may be in a different time or place.

Differences Between LDs and Djs


In all lucid dreams, the dreamer is aware s/he is dreaming.

This is only sometimes true in dreamjourneys. Thus, some dreamjourneys are also lucid dreams.

2. A DREAM VS. "MORE" (or other) THAN A DREAM.

After a lucid dream (that is lucid, but not a dreamjourney), the dreamer feels like it was an exceptional, powerful and realistic experience, but it still feels like a dream, albeit a remarkable one.

Whereas after waking from a dreamjourney, the dreamer KNOWS it was MORE than a dream, no matter what anyone says (until or unless they are persuaded to treat the experience as if it were a regular dream). It contains dream elements, and manifests in dream form, but the dreamer feels there was something else involved, beyond their usual dream experience.


The lucid dream can reveal important personal messages relevant to the dreamer's life.

The dreamjourney reveals truths and messages not only about the dreamer and his/her life, but about the spiritual world, the meaning of life, the nature of reality, and other metaphysical revelations.


In lucid dreams, the dreamer can often change the environment and the actions of other characters in the dream.

This is not true in dreamjourneys that are not lucid.


There is somewhat more consistency to the environment in a dreamjourney than in a lucid dream. For example, in "Exploring the World ofLucid Dreaming," Dr. LaBerge states that in a lucid dream, the dreamer may

look at a printed word on a page, look away, and when s/he looks back atthe page, the words are different, or gibberish or hieroglyphics.

Similarly, when one looks at the time (in a lucid dream) on a digital watch, it may say "4:52" and a second later say "10:23." These are examples of "dreamsigns" or inconsistencies in the dreamworld that are ways to

recognize that one is dreaming in order to achieve lucidity.

In dreamjourneys, as in all dreams, the scenes may switch rapidly or be unrealistic. But in most dreamjourneys, there is more consistency within

that scene. For example, if you see a particular mark on the wall of the cave you are in, and you look away to look at the snake who is talking to you, and you look back at the wall of the cave, you will probably still see

that mark. Perhaps this is because a lucid dream is still an experience that is in the regular dreamworld, created by the unconscious mind, while true dreamjourneys are actually visits to another reality that does not

necessarily depend upon the dreamer's mind to keep the details consistent.

At least, that is my theory, but I welcome your explanations...

* Thus, it is necessary in dreamjourneys to look for other dreamsigns to achieve lucidity, as there is more consistency in the environment and specific details.


Lucid dreams that are not also dreamjourneys lend themselves well to symbolic dream interpretation.

Dreamjourneys are best analyzed from a revelatory perspective, and understood rather than interpreted. They are more literal experiences, akin to mystical visions.


Lucid dreams that are not also dreamjourneys generally contain a time rate of passage that is close to that of waking reality.

Dreamjourneys, like other transcendent spiritual experiences, often transcend the regular rate of time passage. Thus, in a dreamjourney you can

feel like time is standing still and you are experiencing eternity. Or you can experience many lifetimes in mere seconds. The spiritual realms are not limited by time any more than they are limited by space.


When the dreamer awakens from a LD that was not also a DJ, s/he is struck by how vivid and real the LD felt, but the sense of "waking up" is close to that of other dreams. There is a change in state, a barrier or

veil that is pushed through to wake up.

Awakening from a DJ feels "Like I was already awake and just opened my eyes."

Each column, we will analyze one or more dreams from this new perspective, comparing, contrasting and combining it with other styles of dream analysis, to discern meaningful messages and find universaliies to

the human dream experience.

Other topics to be covered:

* Detailed analysis of specific, real dreamjourneys of all types

* How to use spiritual techniques to increase your ability to DJ

* How to recognize and validate your dreamjourneys

* Techniques for understanding dreamjourneys

* Similarities and differences between DJs and awake visions

* Carlos Castenada and other shamanic perspectives on dreamjourneys

* Dreamjourneys and the creative process

* Your suggestions

* Your dreamjourneys!

NEXT COLUMN: DreamJourneys Throughout the World

Many cultures have recognized the spiritual significance of dreams, and have understood that dreams are always journeys to an alternate reality

of sorts. In the dreamstate, we are closer to the spirit world. Next column (space permitting), we'll look at the spiritual dreams of many cultures, possibly including the Senoi, Iroquois, Mohave, Hopi, Ojibwa, Indian Upanishadics, ancient Greeks, Siberian shamans, Islamic world, pagans and more.

Sweet Dreams! And dream on...


1 By using the word "just," I do not intend to trivialize the importance of other dreams. I use this word because this expression is almost universally the way people describe dreamjourneys, in their own


2 The psychological perspective tells us everything is within our own minds, that the entire universe exists within our perception of it, in the mind. Many spiritual perspectives look without, rather than within, and see

that there are deities, energies, or forces, and planes of existence, beyond the mind and beyond the self, that are accessible by others and not just existing in the individual mind. Perhaps both of these perspectives

differ only in semantics. Or perhaps they are truly different, yet both true. The worlds of the mind and spirit do not know mutual exclusivities.

My own spiritual experiences, including dreamjourneys, have "proven" to me, beyond any proof science or mental (of the mind) activity could ever do, the actual existence of spiritual forces, good, evil, neutral, that are both contained within and simultaneously beyond my self. When you have directly experienced Spirit, God/dess, heaven, hell, angels (or your own equivalent), and receive divine messages every day, you know - at the

soul's level of knowing - that there is more than the mind creating these things. I do not think, though, that it is necessarily true for everyone that the spiritual world has to be beyond their own self. I recognize that

for many spiritual people, all these things are parts of their self, and they see Spirit or God/dess as their Higher Self, their God Self, etc. I don't argue with this perspective. Psychology and spirituality are intricately, intimately interwoven, not opposites. I do think, though, that it is a Cartesian denial of Spirit to say that everything is "mind" (and self) only. If all the great sacred experiences every human being has ever had are just a part of their own mind, then what is meant by the word "mind" must be truly expansive and must therefore include what I call "soul" and "Spirit." Jung recognized that there is a universality to human transcendent experience, which he called the collective unconscious.

Perhaps this is exactly the same as what I call Spirit, or what many of us call God, which manifests in different forms. But whichever camp you lie in, I believe dreamjourneys can be a powerful transformational vehicle on your own personal path to Spirit.

3 The question arises: Is it true that the place visited in a dreamjourney exists separate from the dreamer, and can be visited by others? In other words, can the existence of the spiritual world(s) be proven in the physical world? I will discuss later the work of Carlos Castenada, myself, and other shamans of various cultures that do point to the separate, real existence of spiritual worlds. I have experienced them myself, and know that many millions of other people have, too. But can this be proven to the nonbeliever, or to a skeptic who wants tangible proof of the intangible? No, probably not. No scholarly, literary or artistic work about religion or spirituality to date has conclusively proves the existence of the soul and the spiritual nature of reality. I do not purport to be able to do this in this single work.

Many will read this and dispute it on the basis that it is not scientifically confirmed. This is an age-old conundrum. I myself seriously doubt that the existence of Spirit or spiritual realities can ever be

"proven" scientifically; the very nature of spiritual reality is beyond our physical reality. (This may sound like circular logic, but it is true, by definition.) But there is a great deal of anecdotal evidence. I have collected many examples of dreamjourneyers who have never met having visited very similar places in dreamjourneys. Also, there are thousands of documented cases of similar dreams and visions of heaven, God, white light, bliss, characterizing near-death experiences (NDEs), whether as waking visions or dreamjourneys. But this still doesn't prove to the skeptic that this place, or even a deity, exists. It is possible, after all, that these people simply share a common internal concept of heaven, God, the afterlife, etc., rather than that this is universally a heavenly, accessible place for everyone.

But far more convincing even than the accumulated centuries of anecdotal evidence is direct experiential evidence. Even more than "seeing is believing," experiencing is believing, and understanding. I know what I know, at the level of the soul, through direct experience. I hope to reach some of you who will read this, to help you recognize your own sacred dreamjourneys, to broaden the understanding of your dreams to honor the spiritual, as well as the psychological, perspectives. If you experience it for yourself, you know. As David Engle put it in Divine Dreams: "No rationalizing discourse from a mere human could surpass the effect of even a five-second visit from an angel who looks more beautiful and beams forth

more wisdom than any sight you have even imagined." I recognize that not everyone is ready, willing, able or even interested in this spiritual approach. But some people are, and this perspective has been thus far a

tiny voice in dream study in this country. In ancient times, the focus was almost exclusively on the precognitive, revelatory aspect of dreams, to an extreme. Now, the pendulum has swung the other way! If my work can be even a tiny part of the spiritual awakening of some, and enhance understanding of the dream experience, it will be worth this work. And, at the very least, we will enjoy some stimulating discourse on spiritual dreams. But

prove the existence of God, the soul, the afterlife, alternate realities?

Probably not to the satisfaction of many... and that's perfectly all right. It's supremely difficult to squeeze stuff of the spirit into these tiny boxes we call "words"!




GLOBAL DREAMING NEWS November 18, 1995


A joint project of Electric Dreams and The Novato Center for Dreams, coordinated by the Wilkerson DreamGate, an International Internet Dream Community Center (IIDCC) project. Send all dream news to Richard Wilkerson, or post as instructed below:


If you see this posted in the alt.dreams newsgroup, feel free to post additional information.




- ASD HomePage now online

- Registration form for ASD XIII

- Call for Presentations Hotline

- Internet Projects at the convention.

- How to become a member.

- Location on the net




THE ALEXANDRIA PROJECT: For The Donation & Preservation Of Dream Resources



Although there is a $10.00 fee for this class, you couldn't find one offline like it for under $250.00!

From Freud to Jung, from Existential to Phenomenological, from early 20th Century theories to late 20th Century practices, this class covers it all! Learn about the opinions of modern science as well as the practices of ancient dream arts. Also, learn about all the ways dreams are now explored on the net. All to your email doorstep and at your own pace!

For Class syllabus and information, send to Richard Wilkerson at





==== ASD HomePage is now online =====

Jayne Gackenbach has turned on the new ASD homepage and though it is under construction, you can find lots of useful information about ASD, join and register for the convention and look up information on some members.

======= ASD 13 in Berkeley, California ========

The next ASD International Conference will be July 9-14 , 1996 at the Claremont in Berkeley, California.

For online information, see:

ASD has a delightful new web page created by

John Suler that has the registration form and Joanne Rochon's Flyer.

John has also created links from the page to the ASD San Francisco Regional meeting information on Dan Cumming's DreamMosaic Web page.

The URL or web address for ASD Registration form is:

Be sure if you visit the site to check out the rest of his stuff ondreams, play and psychotherapy _>

His Working and Playing with Dreams Page on WWW is part of his Teaching Clinical Psychology site -

======== Registration Form ==========

Available online at

13th International Conference

of the Association for the Study of Dreams

Claremont Hotel and Resort

Berkeley, CA - July 9-13, 1996


Make check/money order payable to ASD (U.S. dollars) or fill in your American Express number below and mail with this registration form to: ASD Conference,

P.O. Box 1600-P, Vienna, VA 22183, U.S.A.

Name ________________________________________________

Address _____________________________________________

City ________________________________________________

State/Province___________________ Country ___________

Zip/Postal Code______________________________________

Day Phone (___)________ Evening Phone (___)__________

Special needs/requests: _____________________________

CONFERENCE FEES Prior to June 24, 1996 On-site Only

Member................... $200.00 $250.00

Non-Member............... $270.00 $320.00

Student member........... $110.00 $115.00

Student non-member....... $150.00 $155.00

Limited income........... $110.00 $115.00

One Day.................. $100.00 T_W_T_F_S_ $105.00

Student Limited income.. $50.00 T_W_T_F_S_ $55.00

Evening event............ $20.00 $20.00

Conference Fee: $____________


Annual membership fees:

Regular $70.00

Student $45.00 -> Proof of full-time student status

Limited Income $45.00 -> Under $20,000 annual income

Couple $90.00 ->Living at one address, one copy of pub.

Patron $150.00

[ ] Check here if you *do not* wish to have your name included on the distributed membership and conference attendance lists.

Membership Fee $ _____________

TOTAL Enclosed $ _____________

American Express # ________________________________

exp. date________________

Signature _________________________________________



[ ] Tuesday Evening - Opening Reception

[ ] Thursday - Special luncheon

[ ] Penne Pasta w/ Grilled Chicken Julienne, Dessert

[ ] Fresh Grilled Ahi Salad Nicoise, Dessert

[ ] Vegetarian Lasagna w/Basil, Dessert

[ ] Saturday Evening - Annual Dream Ball



[ ] Male

[ ] Female

[ ] Smoker

[ ] Non-Smoker


REGISTRATION POLICIES: Mail registrations will not be accepted after June 24, 1996. On-Site registration will be available in Berkeley on a space-available basis. for refund requests received prior to June 24, 1996, we will assess a $15.00 handling fee. No refunds will be processed for cancellations received after June 24, 1996. Address questions to the ASD Central Office in Vienna, VA, USA, (703) 242-0062 or phone/fax: (703)242-8888, or the ASD Conference xiii Hotline (510) 869-4066.

LODGING: Call Claremont Hotel Reservations 1-800-551-7266. You *must* mention that you are attending the ASD conference to receive the discounted rate. *Please send NO money for lodging with this registration form.


=========== end registration form ================


More will be presented on this later this year, however, if you are planning an internet or computer project for the convention or would like to connect to the convention via the net, there is an asd mail list which you may join by contacting Richard Wilkerson


Hotline for hardcopy: 1-510 869 4066

===== Deadline for Submissions for the conference is JANUARY 15, 1996. =====

ascii copy of Call for Presentations at :

IIDCC Dream Community Center


look under Projects/asd96

(source: ASD Conference Planning Committee)


Also, if you are interested in information on how to join ASD and receive a quarterly journal _Dreaming_ , the quarterly newsletter _ASD Newsletter_ and some

cuts on conference rates, just send your request snail mail to:

ASD P.O. Box 1600 Vienna, VA 22183

or use the Web form at

**If you say you saw the ad for membership on GD News or internet you will receive some extra goodies!**

(Source: ASD Newsletter, Rita Dwyer)


The Association for the Study of Dreams

and the

California Institute of Integral Studies


Dreams, Spirit and Shadow

February 16-17, 1996

Bogzaran, Bulkeley, the Coburns, Deslauriers, Garfield,

Krippner, Laberge, Magallòn, Siegel, Taylor and others

A Regional Meeting of the Association for the Study of


Spiritual seekers across cultures have turned to their dreams for inspiration in their innermost quest. Powerful dreams offer a direct and intimate gateway to our spiritual self. Thus, cultivating dreams brings us in touch with the numinous in all its manifestations. This includes both light and shadow aspects. As Jung once wrote, "It can be expected that we are going to contact spheres of a not yet transformed God when our consciousness extend into the sphere of the unconscious."

This conference is dedicated to the exploration of transformative power of dreams to align the self and the community toward a lived and meaningful vision of the sacred.

Invited addresses 7-9 p.m. Friday Night

Who was that masked man, I wanted to thank him--

Dreams, Spirit and Shadow.

Jeremy Taylor, M.A. is a Unitarian Universalist minister and an internationally known author, teacher and dream worker.

He is past president of the Association for the Study of

Dreams (ASD) and is author of Dream Work: Techniques for

discovering the Creative Power in Dreams and Where People Fly and Water Runs Uphill: Using Dreams to Tap the Wisdom of the Unconscious.

Saturday Afternoon

Dream Messages from the Dead

Patricia Garfield, Ph.D.,

Internationally known pioneer in the field of dreams, Dr

Garfield is the author several books including Creative

Dreaming; Women's Bodies, Women's Dreams; Pathway to

Ecstasy; The Healing Power of Dreams; and Dream Messages

from the Dead (forthcoming).

Concurrent session: Saturday morning and afternoon

Transpersonal dimensions of lucid dreaming Fariba Bogzaran, Ph.D., faculty member at John F. Kennedy

University teaches classes on Dreams and Consciousness

Studies. She had done extensive research on the

transpersonal aspects of lucid dreaming. She is the

director of the Center for Dream Creations and has pioneered non-verbal approaches for working with dreams through trance and expressive arts.

Dreaming as a Spiritual Practice

Kelly Bulkeley, Ph.D. is the author of The Wilderness of

Dreams and Spiritual Dreaming and the editor of Among all

these dreamers (forthcoming). He is a visiting scholar at the Graduate Theological Union at U.C. Berkeley and Chair of the ASD Education Committee.

Shaman's Dream: A Spirit Guide Adventure

Chuck and Shirley Coburn

Chuck Coburn is a professional psychic, teacher and

lecturer. He is the author of Funny You should Say That... A lighthearted awakening to psychic awareness.. Shirley Coburn is dreamworker and co-producer of educational films. She serves on the board of Directors of the ASD.

Dreams and Meditation

Daniel Deslauriers, Ph.D. is core faculty at the California Institute of Integral Studies where he teaches classes on dreams and imagination. He is co-author of the book Le rêve: sa nature, sa fonction et une méthode d'analyse. He has done qualitative research on dream incubation, dream understanding, body awareness and spiritual dreams.

Power Points in the Dream Mandala

Stanley Krippner, Ph.D., is a professor of Psychology at

Saybrook Institute and past president of the ASD. He is a fellow of the American Psychological Association and The American Society of Clinical Hypnosis. He has co-authored several books including Dream Telepathy and Dreamworking and edited Dreamtime, Dreamwork.

Integrating the Shadow in Lucid Dreams

Stephen LaBerge, Ph.D., author of best selling book Lucid

Dreaming, is a research associate in the Department of Psychology at Stanford University. He is also the coeditor of Conscious Mind , Sleeping Brain: Perspectives on Lucid Dreaming and the founder of the Lucidity Institute.

Mutual Dreaming: The flight from the Shadow

Linda Magallòn, M.B.A. is the author of Mutual Dreaming

(forthcoming), and does research on lucid, telepathic, mutual and flying dreams. She is co-founder of the Bay Area Dreamworker Group and a former publisher of the Dream Network Bulletin.

Light and Shadow in Turning Point Dreams

Alan Siegel, Ph.D. is a psychologist in private practice in Berkeley and San Francisco and is on the faculty at the California School of Professional Psychology. He is the editor of the ASD newsletter and the author of Dreams That Can Change Your Life: Navigating Life's Passages Through Turning Point Dreams.

In addition:

Panel on current research on dream and spirituality

with Nora Archambeau and others


Cost: Friday evening public lecture, $10, $8 (students)

Entire Workshop (including Friday evening public lecture),


REGISTRATION: CIIS, Public Program, (415) 753-6100, ext.


ASD Contact Person:

Daniel Deslauriers, Ph.D.,

East-West Psychology

CIIS, (415) 753-6100 ext. 157

**If you say you saw this on Internet or GD news when you register, you will receive a "Dream Guide to Internet" at the registration table! **

(Source: Daniel Deslauriers)

This conference file is also available on the Web

at Dan Cummings site:





Michael Adams is completing a book _The Multicultural

Imagination: "Race," Color and the Unconscious_ which

will be published by Routledge in 1996.

The book will include a section on what he is calling

"color-change" dreams (which he presented at the 1993

ASD conference in Santa Fe as "Racial Identity Dreams".

M. Adams is now asking that anyone willing to share

dreams where they have color-change. These dreams need

to be sent with permission to publish as they might be

included in his book.

"I would appreciate receiving from you dreams in which

the dreamer or any other figure in the dream changes

color or 'race.' I would also be grateful for any

associations or interpretations that you would be

willing to share. I would also need to know the 'race'

(or ethnicity), age and sex of the dreamer. Please let

me know if you would like to be acknowledged and

credited by name in the book or if you would prefer to

remain anonymous." Michael Vannoy Adams

Please send all dreams through email

(Source: Michael Vannoy Adams)


Seeking: Dolphin Dreams

Trisha Lamb Feuerstein ( is seeking dolphin and whale dreams for a book on the psychological and spiritual significance of cetaceans as evinced in myth, art, dreams, fiction, and human-cetacean


(Source: T.L. Feuerstein)


The Alexandria Project

For The Donation & Preservation Of Dream Resources


The Alexandria Project is named after the famous library in Egypt (founded ca. 300 B.C.) which stored the collective wisdom of the Hellanistic world. At this point in history,there has been a resurgence of dream materials from a broad spectrum of sources. Today we can gather a wide variety of information and knowledge on the subject of dreams. Due to modern technology, we have an unparalleled opportunity and responsibility to keep these materials available for the present and safe for the future. The long-term goal for this collection is to use electronic means to scan, duplicate and access these materials.

The fact is that the dream resources of our age are

vanishing due to the lack of a central collection point.

Dreamers and dreamworkers are producing and collecting dream materials which have no place to go where people who care about dreams can access them now and in the future. The Alexandria Project is the remedy to that situation.

Specifically what is needed now?

Dream-related Materials:

Books, hardcover and soft, dream inspired fiction and

nonfiction, adult and children, which have at least one

chapter on dreams. Rare books, welcome for the archive.

Unpublished manuscripts including bachelor, master and

doctoral theses. Conference papers, term papers, published and unpublished articles. Pamphlets and booklets. Newspaper clippings, dream cartoons and notecards. Short stories, poetry and sheet music. Periodicals, both current and past. Teaching materials, resumés, business cards or a personal statement of how you work or play with dreams. Flyers, past and present, including xerox copies. Audio tapes, video tapes and cds of dream-related music. Photos, colored xerox and slides of dreamworkers, events and art. Dream-inspired art and incubation materials. Dream-related products and devices.


Money to acquire precious materials available only through purchase. Funding to assure non-profit status.

Materials donated to the Alexandria Project go to the

Dream Library and Archive located at the Novato Center For Dreams in Novato, California. Both the Project and the Dream Library and Archive have been in existence since 1990. Novato Center For Dreams was founded in 1987.

The Dream Library includes an on-site reference library available by appointment and a lending library. The Archive houses on-site rare or fragile materials which receive special care and handling. Once the library holdings reached 1000 titles, momentum and interest from the dreaming community increased dramatically.

How have people become involved in this project so far?

Donated used books from their own collections, especially at time of moving and spring cleaning. Offered complimentary autographed copies of their works. Sent copies of past and current flyers or brochures. Given complimentary dream products. Donated subscriptions to a dream periodical or a set of back issues. Scouted for unaquired titles in their own area or while traveling. Contributed a piece of dream art for wall display. Recommended materials for inclusion in collection. Posted project requests and placed Center on their mailing list. Visited the Center and took advantage of the opportunity to informally document themselves and their work via photograph, audio and video tape. Duplicated slides

for the slide registry. Separated their dream books etc from other books and sent a list of dream materials owned to the Center. Volunteered time at the Center; do data entry. Sorted out dream materials for donation at a later date. Made bequests and included the Dream Library and Archive during estate planning.

How can I donate?

Send materials to Jill Gregory, Director of the Dream

Library & Archive, Novato Center For Dreams, PO Box 866 Novato CA 94948 / (415) 897-7955 or Linda Lane Magallón,

1083 Harvest Meadow Court, San José, CA 95126 / (408) 266-5397. For donations by electronic means, e-mail Richard Wilkerson at <>

To volunteer for the project, please contact Jill Gregory. Available for volunteers are further information on this project, a wish list of materials desired and a current list of holdings. Join us in collecting and preserving our dream gifts and wisdom for all of us ... now and for the future!

(Source: Novato Center for Dreams)



If you want to submit news to Global Dreaming

News, send to Richard Wilkerson email address

<> or post on the alt.dreams current issue.


Dream Network Journal and World


Special Thanks to Dream Network Journal for posting a notification for Electric Dreams. What, never heard of Dream Network Journal?

_Dream Network, a Quarterly Journal Exploring Dreams &

Myth._ Since 1982, They have been providing encouragement to dreamers, information and networking services, internationally. Each issue contains a section on The Art of Dreamsharing & Dream Education, the Mythic Dimension and articles which respond to Questions posed in the previous issue. The classified section offers

dreams/readers the opportunity to initiate and engage in

research projects and to form or participate in existing dream groups. Sample issue: $5.59/One Year/$22. Also

available, a 44 page booklet, The Art of Dreamsharing &

Developing Dream Groups that would enhance dreamplay on

any Electric Dreams dreamsharing activity: $5 + $1 (P&H). For Information, email to Roberta Ossana's email address

or subscribe via VISA, Mastercard, AmEx : 1-800-To-1-DREAM (800-861-3732).

Be sure to visit the Dream Net Web site at

Explore the networked world of DN and be sure to

read H. Roberta Ossana's new Dream Autobiography!


Reprinted with permission from:


Issue #2 - contact Repsi at



by Stephanie Grusch

Autumn wind around the painted leaves

Chilled the forest heart without a rest.

Ever the pounding silence of the air

Stirred reminders of the frost in the robin's breast.

In the chill air in the forest walked

A figure almost without life or name

In endless sorrow to the silent wind

It cried in endless agony and painful shame.

And I watched from the safe window

Shut in like a dreamer-no power

No power over the dream, only a watcher

And so I stared for a silent, fearful hour.

Safe from the cold outside, doing nothing

Nothing to help the figure in its pain

Unknowing, even careless of its cries

Never wondering its business or its name.

Never questioning the sorrow in the dark cold woods

Where the autumn wind blew the painted leaves

I turned from the window and did not look back

For the dream lasts only while the dreamer believes.


*Section 3*


"Nightmares Leave Messes"


by Brandi McElhatten

Rain washes the blood

off of streets stained and sinned on

broken glass litters the ground

feet are cut and bruised

Furniture lay broken in the middle of the street

this odd sight seems out of place

the starving dog trots by burning remnants

and hungry tenements.

There is no food for him here.

It's hard to believe there ever was.

Something echoes in the air

although it is silent.

It's dead, this place.

It could be anywhere

now it's gone

a rag doll lays on the ground, its eyes closed

Nightmares leave messes.





1) Commentary on Dream: "Oaxacian Animals" (Marys Sister) Some Dream Boorlean Logic by Island

(gray) wolf - owl (eyes) - (beautifully painted) snake/dragon/lizard(expecting a snake)/dragon

-deer - rabbit - eagle - bear

(gray) wolf -- Teacher/pathfinder (obscure) <share info by writing or lecturing>

owl (eyes)-- Deception/clairvoyance - magical practices <incapable of being deceived>

snake (transmutation) - <emphasized in dream; variegated colors; having its own life in metamorphosizing because against dreamer's expectatation>

dragon <fabulous monster>

lizard <the dreamer who expects the snake>

dragon <initial resolution>

deer <much to the dragon's anger/sorrow/surprise/delight/joy, his armour melted away in that presence>

rabbit <fear -aha! gotcha>

eagle <courageously attacks fear of unknown by connecting to the Universe>

bear <introspection/seeker of Wisdom/Truth/inner knowing>

Source: Medicine Cards: The Discovery of Power Through the Way Of Animals by Jamie Sams & David Carson, Bear & Co., Sante Fe, NM


2) Taodreams "Guitar Shop Friend" by Island

Original dream: I was with a woman and somehow the conversation got around to guitars and I said I needed a new one. Shesaid we should go to the Old Town School of Music (its a folk music school that presents folk concerts, etc). I said I didn't think they sold guitars and if they did they would be expensive. She said even if they were expensive the owner would know where we

could get one cheaper. So we went to the schooland sure enough they had a store that sold guitars, mandolins, banjo's etc. We walked around looking at the prices and they were expensive

($1,400 for an acoustic and the same for an electric) so the woman went up to the owner to ask if there was somewhere close that sold cheaper guitars. For some reason I tried to discourage her (I think I felt foolish looking for a cheaper guitar), but she went ahead and asked. The owner said there were several stores close by. We decided to go look at the other stores and left, looking at a few more instruments (banjo and mandolin) on the way out. The dream ended before we left the store. One of the things I found interesting about the dream is that the woman i was with was not my wife, and I don't know her in real life, but I felt very comfortable with her as if she were an old friend.

If it were my dream, I would say to myself, Island, you...told the woman you needed a new guitar, but you resisted your own need, not once, but several times. They don't sell guitars and, if so, they're too expensive; you feel foolish; you try to discourage her (from helping you find what you said you needed to begin with). The suggestion that somehow the conversation got around to guitars hints at a subject that is either intimate or difficult to broach. Is there the anything especially wrong with the guitar you now? Remember musical instruments can be symbolic for the human being, and the quality of music being played or piped is similar to the tenor of the personality. Think of how music differs throughout the world, depending on what peoples are doing the composing and/or playing. Or even how music differs through the centuries. But maybe the instruments with strings (for plucking) are especially suggestive of the soul of the human being played upon, or sounding out of its own volition. Remember that the lyre, another stringed instrument, is considered by some poets to be the vessel which is receptive to the wind, or muse, sweeping through it. Where is that written? Oh, I found it. Here. Shelley wrote in his Defense of Poetry, "Man is an instrument over which a series of external and internal impressions are driven like the alternations of an

ever-changing wind over an Aeoliain lyre which move it by their motion to ever-changing melody (in Shelley's Prose: Or the Trumpet of a Prophecy, ed. David Lee Clark, Univ. of New Mexico Press, Albuquerque, 1954, p.277).

But it's interesting here how the woman in the dream says "we should go to the Old Town School of Music". When a voice refers to something very specific in the dream, I perk up. Remember one

time I had a dream that I got married in Erewhon? Never heard of it (though now a health food company sells some kind of cereal by that name). Turns out Erewhon is ananagram for Nowhere.

Anyway, Island, you suggest what "Old Town School of Music" is about. Folk music (as in the sixties, the radical fringe with peace/love/freedom and all of that)? What has become of that Old

Town School of Music? If they sold guitars, your take on it is that "they would be expensive." Values like that do come at a high price this day and time. Nearly prohibitive. Yet the school's owner knows where to get a cheaper guitar. Is someone selling him/herself short? Are someone's values being cheapened? Who is this owner? Anyone you know? Then looking at a garden variety of guitars: mandolins, banjos, etc. Real folksy, grass roots sound. These were being sold, as in sold old? Sold down the river? But so expensive. And then too I have a hard time imagining folk songs being played on electrical instruments, but why not? Anything's possible. You have a choice here: whether you take the high tech road (electrical instruments -- they don't sound on their own, requiring amplifiers, etc.) or the low tech road (acoustic instruments, making their own music), the cost to (lucky) the price will be the same. Uh-oh. Has the piper been paid lately? Always gets his/her cut. Speaking of costs: know any adolescents around 14? But what really springs to mind is the number 1+4 (foundation for manifestation) resolving to five: active will and creative personality, doubly emphasized with use of zeros. So the dream concludes with a decision: leaving the Old Town School of Music for other stores (a place of exchange where goods are bought and sold? Storehouse? Free enterprise? Options opening up?). And you looked at a few more instruments on your way out. So in the meantime before you go shopping around at the other neighboring stores, pull up a chair, grab a smoke, and muse/dream on it awhile. I 'spect you'll be strumming soon.

Here's another man's take on how someone imagined himself an "instrument" to drive a point home. Hopefully it'll provide yet another possibility of considering the dream.

Hamlet: "Will you play upon this pipe?"

Guildenstern: "My lord, I cannot."

Hamlet: "I pray you."

Guildenstern: "Believe me, I cannot."

Hamlet: "I do beseech you."

Guildenstern: "I know no touch of it, my lord."

Hamlet: "It is as easy as lying. Govern these ventages [stops] with your fingers and [thumbs], give it breath with your mouth, and it will discourse most eloquent music. Look you, these are the stops."

Guildenstern: "But these I cannot command to any utt'rance of harmony. I have not the skill."

Hamlet: "Why, look you now, how unworthy a thing you make of me! You would play upon me, you would seem to know my stops, you would pluck out the heart of my mystery, you would sound me from my lowest note to [the top of] my compass; and there is much music, excellent voice, in this little organ [instrument], yet you cannot make it speak. Sblood, do you think I am easier to be play'd on than a pipe? Call me what instrument you will, though you fret [finger an instrument, or vex] me, [yet] you cannot play upon me."

[From Hamlet, III.ii.350-372, The Riverside Shakespeare, Houghton Mifflin, Boston, 1974]


3) Comment on Trisha Lamb Feuerstein's Dream (December 1993): "Orca Yin-Yang Dream" (ED2:10) by Island

This could be my dream, but since it's not, I'll say if it were dream, these are the thoughts and feelings I would have while exploring it more deeply. Thanks to Trisha for having both dreamed and shared it...

< I was driving across a vast expanse>

Suggests alienation in an arena of unlimited potentiality. Also a desert comes to mind, which can suggest a spiritual haven through which the car is being driven at some speed.

< of flat land, all of it brown and dusty,>

the earthy color, "brown," combined with "dusty," perhaps emphasizes the sense of "from dust to dust": though there is potential, all potential culminates and ends. The feeling tone here is desolation, perhaps with that thought, which might have given rise to a question, "Why drive at all?" We seem in control of our own destiny, however.

< in my mustard-colored Toyota Corolla.>

If I owned such a car, and was driving it at the time, here is the present. I would not push the color and make of the car, as symbolic, if such is the case, too far, but the dreamer did choose the color "mustard" to describe the color (e.g., the car could have been described as something akin to yellow/orange). And we did acquire the make. Therefore, what springs to my mind is the proverbial "mustard seed" which only takes a grain to eventually move mountains. Who knows if mountains may not be at the edge of this vast expanse? (Turns out in this dream, though, a slope of some kind, instead of a mountain, initially breaks the monotony). And also springing to mind is the fact that "eyes" are emphasized in the recounting of the dream: later a "crystal clear river" is described as a color, <pale, aqua blue>, like <malamute's (an Alaskan sled dog) eyes.> Also the dreamer frequently exercises the use of sight to move the dream forward ("could see; what looked; saw; staring). Both the driver and the Toyota (a foreign car; its name suggesting to me an

element of play, perhaps trivial play... (also doesn't the sound "toyota" evoke a miniature of some kind?) have eyes (headlights) and are on the move just like the malamute.

And the word "corolla" resonates with the words, "corona," which has as one of its many meanings, a ring around a celestial body visible through a haze, and corola (the flower's outer env

elope, the word itself a diminutive or corona, which in this instance, means "garland" or "crown") What a nice resounding ring...

< 1) Off in the far distance I could see>

Far sighted, even visionary...

< 2) what looked like an industrial area, >

A lot of communal activity going on, in contradistinction to the at present lonely drive

< 3) with large buildings,>

How many dreamers are housed within? Who's dreams have been crushed, perhaps?

< 4) smokestacks, >

Quite a masculine symbol, which can be described as entering the womb of the sky; and smoke pours out...the image is potent enough, without further ado

< 5) pollution,etc. >

Pollution is like nature's own mist or fog, but manmade. An impurity or even desecration of values is suggested: the priorities are, perhaps, like the smokestacks, and the

"large buildings" perhaps are not really delineated in finer detail, therefore, a huge unknown. What's the old adage? Where

there's smoke, there's fire? Or has the fire already happened, and the smoke remains?

< 6) It all seemed so desolate and lifeless.

Dreamlines I've numbered 1-6 brings to mind poetic line from Ezra Pound's Pisan Cantos: "The enormous tragedy of the dream in the peasant's bent // shoulders" though no peasants or workers

are imagined as being dreamt (LXXIV). Desolate because perhaps currently being viewed through a polluted fog or mist. But what is really interesting is what the eyes take in: a sort of rhythm of movement: first, the buildings (physical body); followed by smokestacks (penetrating the sky); settling on the surrounding pollution, which may settle like the brown and dusty earth the car ventures across.

< As I drove I suddenly found myself>

Great shift in consciousness, through the act of driving

< alongside a river, >

but the scenary has changed, as well. Now journeying on a path parallel to the emotional, rather than physical, or sensual, realm.

<on the opposite side from the vast expanse of flat land I had been driving through.>

Opposite, but all opposites are ultimately a synthesis. Here reconciliation (of emotions and materiality) is lacking. Notice how we do not get out of the car and take a dip but instead...

< Here I drove up>

ascension controlled by the driver

< an almost vertical slope >


(angular) suggesting masculine;

and slope (round)

suggesting feminine

<of dry, dusty, brown land>

sterility in that climb: TS Eliot's The Wasteland calls home to me! See particular sections...

< that descended just as steeply >

"What goes up / must come down / spinning wheels"...but the car (and itsdriver) does not descend, with the eyes witnessing the descent.

<beyond the rounded crest. >

Crest? Breast? The shape of the land confirms the sound chosen to describe it.

<At the crest of the slope >

How high was the slope? A dune, hill, mountain? Whatever its height suggests how far we go in

that particular direction.

<I stopped the car and got out>

Shifting consciousness; no longer requiring a vehicle for movement or direction. In fact, the car seems to disappear at this point from the dream.

< and saw that the river >

River: not a pool, lake, or ocean? Vital, mercurial emotional life in flux. I thought of Heracleitus in musing this dream, and turned to read that Anaximander, one of Heracleitus sources, believed that all opposites were contained in the Infinite: the potential becomes actual; and diversity results, followed by dissolution, where all is resolved. In this rise and fall (much like the slope your car stopped on midpoint), these new worlds are born in endless succession, only to evolve and die (speaking to the philosophical question perhaps being posed at the dream's beginning).

But significantly, hostile elements struggle with one another throughout this cycle. And for this opposition, "Things perish into those from which they have been born." This seemingly futile

struggle can be imagined to be taking place in the buildings alluded to earlier (or can be imagined not to be taking place, honoring whatever the dreamer's predilections may be). And what would appear to be capable of presenting great opposition and struggle are what comes later, the polar bear and two orcas, who play, suggesting that -- as joy goes hand in hand with sorrow or pain, hostility and aggression go hand in hand with harmony. As Yeats said, "Everything we look upon is blessed."

<was divided at the crest by a bar of land, just slightly submerged, that ran across the width of the river>

I am reminded of primordial beginnings; a whale's back just emerging from the water; left/right brain; secure ground in the midst of flux; a necessity for division or the right or wrong of

something; and an old folk song whose words resound in my mind, The river is wide / I cannot cross over / Neither do I have wings to fly / Give me a ship / that can carry two ....

< The water in the river was crystal clear-->

Nothing muddy here: no dust, smoke or pollutants

<a pale aqua blue, >

Obviously spiritual: spirituality giving way to fertility (blue/green)

<like a malamute's eyes. >

Shot through with the dreamer's reference to a decidedly masculine being: one who can traverse harsh, Alaskan natural environment (in stark contrast to the industrial c

omplex) pulling a sled (instead of a car)

< On the left side of the river,>

Opposites emphasized yet again. No need to comment on left/right approaches --

< just under the water, and right next to the bar,>

Under the weather, perhaps? Bar, as in the bar scene? Entering or leaving? Oh well. Just thought I'd throw that in. The dream seems a little bit too profound for that, but one never knows for sure...

< stood a polar bear. >

(Say his/her name. Rather, sound out his/her name backwards. "Bear - polar." Sounds much like: bipolar, doesn't it? Which is the expression of two opposite or contradictory ideas or qualities, yin/yanging around the globe ...)

<He (or she?--I recall that it had a masculine feel,>

Is that all? Boy, if I saw a polar bear staring at me, I'd have gotten back into my car, placed it in reverse and retreated for that slope I saw just before! Does he/she hang out with the malamute?

Maybe later...

< but the gender has never been clear) >

Great. I'm all for androgeny. So is June Singer.

<stood completely motionless, staring at me.>

Hey, wait a minute! Is he/she a mirror of sorts? Are we dealing with Narcissus, who looks into the pool and sees his image reflected therein? No, he/she is out of the water, for the most part... yet actually more poetry comes to mind: "...and your hair wet, I could not // Speak, and my eyes failed, I was neither // Living nor dead, and I knew nothing, // Looking into the heart of light, the silence. // Oed' und leer das Meer (empty and waste the sea)" Actually TS Eliot is inspired here in The Wasteland by Wager's opera, Tristan and Isolde.

< It was very disturbing,>

Especially if we like to travel the flat lands, being in control...I sure do.

<almost ominous, >

a little approach/avoidance (or a lot)? I'll say, again, I'd run for the hills, but they do make for the best Tristan & Isolde-like relationships. You can have it. I've already h

ad mine, and the polar bear dreams right along with it.

<and seemed to represent everything buried and unexamined in my unconscious. >

Yes, perhaps. Though springing to my mind is Wagner -- another mammalian capable of delivering archetypal surges of adrenalin...just as the orcas (if they are indeed killer whales, I'm not sure, are they?) coming up...too much specificity in the dream to easily settle on the generalized, "everything buried and unexamined in my unconscious." Is there something more specific going on?

< On the right side of the river,>

Perhaps consciousness is becoming as clear now as the river with the color of malamute's eyes

< two orcas>

Hey! I forgot to finish the old folksong lyric I quoted earlier: and both shall row / my love and I

< were atop the water>

Something has happened here! I'm all for it.

< joyously playing toss >

Rather joy than happiness any old time. And it doesn't end, seemingly. Just spins from nose to nose to nose...

<with a big sofack and forth between them (from nose to nose).>

And I'll quote Tennyson (again, as I did in an earlier note): "Where is he who knows? From the great deep to the great deep he goes."

< They were in complete balance and harmony--their happiness and utter ease was perfect,>

nothing could be added--and seeing them gave me extraordinary joy!> Isn't it marvelous that we have all been given more than just a pair of eyes ... We have noses too!




Bob: Here's one of my favorite dreams, rich with detail and symbolism. I was most enlightened by Shadow's comments on my "Incredible Controlled Dream" in a recent issue. I'll keep sending my dreams.



==="Determined to Return to School" by Blair===

July 1, 1994

I dreamed that I was driving my old Mercedes 220 Diesel "Doom Doom" back to Oklahoma State University (going back to school is a recurring dream theme). School had already been in session for a week, so I was rushing to get back before it was too late to get in for the semester.

I didn't dream this part, but it seemed to be present in my dream memory: I had been living on the 5th floor of Kerr Hall dorm (I actually lived on the 4th floor in my days at OSU) but moved out. I think I didn't like my pot-luck roommate, so I moved out and started to drive back home to Tucson. But I turned around to drive back.

I arrived at the dorm late at night. I put on my empty backpack, put my golf bag over my shoulder, and went into the dorm. There were a few other people around the front desk (not the same as the actual front desk at Kerr Hall).

I asked the desk clerk, a young, short, black-haired, cocky loudmouth, if I could have my dorm room back. He said that somebody else had already moved in. I then asked if I could have any dorm room at all. He said that it was too late at night and I would have to go to a hotel. I stormed away and yelled, "F*** you!" so that everybody else in the area could hear me.

The clerk then looked around and asked loudly, "Who said that?"

I looked back and said, "I did! I said 'Forget you." He looked at me and I approached him and said calmly and sincerely, "I really appreciate all that you're trying to do for me."

I was then at the entrance of the stairwell. I noticed an open dorm room next to the stairs where there were some dirty-looking rednecks with cowboy hats, unshaven faces, and no shirts on. One was wearing black and white snakeskin cowboy boots. They were laughing, drinking beer, and having fun, but I didn't even pause to look on, nor did I consider joining them.

I went up the stairs to search for an empty dorm room, but could have taken an elevator. I was still carrying my golf clubs and backpack (In the dream these were all my possessions. In reality, however, my car was packed very full with stereo, guitars, records, and clothes when I went to school). I was glad that I had not yet bought my books because they would be heavy. A few flights up there was a place where everyone seemed to leave their golf clubs. There were dozens of bags of clubs crowded together, all standing strait up. I reluctantly left my clubs, afraid that somebody may steal them. I could barely squeeze through all the clubs to continue up the stairs.

I kept imagining a vision of my dorm room--empty and bare except for a bed with ruffled sheets and a thick brown blanket. It looked so comfortable and was motivating me to continue searching for a room.

I continued up the stairs. I got off on a floor that had a big restaurant and an adjoining shop. There was a big balcony that overlooked an impressive city (it was not Stillwater where OSU is located). But I didn't have time to take in the view. The restaurant and shop had black walls, cheap black chairs & tables,

black everything--but very clean, organized, modern, well-lit, and attractive. (Reality note: all my house furnishings are black, my favorite color).

There were a few people in the shop all grouped together and chatting. There were a couple of people walking by on the balcony. It now seemed to be about 6:00 pm.

The store looked like a record/cd store with similar shelves, racks, and displays. An entire wall of the store was stocked with a Queensryche sheet music book for their album Operation Mindcrime (this has no significance to me). The other racks and displays were full of nick nacks that were of no interest

to me, but I don't remember what they were. My vision was blurred when I looked at the things for sale, except for the sheet music books which I could see clearly.

I walked through the store to exit the front so that I could continue searching for a dorm room. As I walked by the front I noticed Geddy Lee and Neil Peart (the bassist and drummer of Rush, one of my very favorite bands and two of my very favorite musicians) behind the cash register counter. They owned and operated the store and restaurant! Geddy Lee was wearing the horn-rimmed glasses that he wore in a picture on the "Permanent Waves" album. They just looked at me as I walked by. They were just like still pictures--they didn't move at all. Geddy Lee's eyes looked huge through the glasses.

I exclaimed, "Wait a minute!" as I walked out the front sliding glass door and turned around suddenly. I noticed the name of the store was "Hephamania" on a pink & green neon sign over the door. I wanted to go back and see if there was any other sheet music for sale.

I walked back in and Neil Peart approached me and asked if I was staying for the party that night. He was closer to me, but never moved--again like a still picture. I enthusiastically responded, "You guys are the greatest!" I reminded myself not to be starstruck, but I was awed and choked up.

I walked back to the small group that had congregated in the store. A girl who struck me as ordinary-looking (dirty straight blond hair, poor pale complexion) approached me and asked if I was staying for the party. I responded, "No, I have to get back to school."

I turned around and walked away. (Then I woke up.)

That's it!

===Commentary by Blair on Determined To Return To School"===

Blair's Self-Analysis of "Determined to Return to School" by Blair:

A simple and obvious explanation is that this dream represents my struggle and determination for success and the requisite sacrifices to achieve that success.

Determination is represented by the decision to return to school, driving late into the night to get back in time, searching for a dorm room after being told to find a hotel, taking the stairs instead of the elevator, and finally telling the girl that I had to get back to school. Sacrifices and rejections include leisure/recreation (symbolized by leaving my golf clubs), frivolity (the partying rednecks), my music ambitions (Geddy Lee & Neil Peart), material possessions (the nick nacks of no interest, the bare & empty dorm, and my empty backpack), and social life (the party and the girl).

But I did not actually reject the music in the dream, still an ambition in my life. I simply made it a lower priority.

What is "Hephamania?" Perhaps it means a heptameter. A heptameter is a verse in a meter of seven. Perhaps this refers to some Rush lyric. Excerpts from "The Analog Kid", which I listened to the previous day, are in 7/4.

I also recall a nick nack shop in Calgary, Alberta, Canada, called "Hephalumps and Woosles" which were creatures from Disney's Fantasia.


It's just turned dark outside. I am downtown walking around and getting ready to go meet a friend of mine. I am wearing a long, dark black trenchcoat. I begin walking down to the building where I am supposed to meet. There are a lot of strange people outside. I don't know them and they all scare me. Strangers who brush their way past me. A friend of mine comes around the corner, holding his large cat, Tango. The cat is a long-haired cat, with brown fur and black stripes and a white belly and paws. This other friend is wearing his air force uniform.

"What are you doing out here this late, Andrea?"

"I am supposed to go and meet George over at that building over there."

A strange, almost indignant look crosses his face, "He didn't offer to walk you from your car?"


"I'm going to have to go and speak to him, then."

He walks off, still holding the cat. I am left alone on the street corner, where it is dark and scary.


===='Night of 3 Stars' by Zoom ===

I was at a party with Antonio Banderas and Teddy (the lawyer/Murder One). There were beautiful trendy people everywhere. I was travelling, so I only had travelling clothes with me....rather casual and schlumpy. I remember feeling self conscious about everything, so I decided to make love to Teddy

first. He was so sensitive and thoughtful (and so HUGE) we had to make love sideways. Weird. The room was lit with candles and decorated with lots jewel tones and gauze. A fire was burning in the fireplace. Large french doors opened onto a second story balcony, it looked like one of the houses in New Orleans' French Quarter. Later, Antonio and I then went to a party. There was a long, freestanding, spiral staircase. At the center, a cellist and another woman were giving a performance. It was so cold that they decided to do a piece based on goose bumps, based on watching goose bumps bump. I was jealous till I found out that the (non cellist) performer, who looked lovingly at Antonio, was his sister. I remember waking up in Antonio's arms, nude, and tearing the room apart looking for my rings (wedding band and engagement ring included). Later that same night, John Travolta and I were going out to eat. No attraction, just two friends having dinner. We were in a house converted into a brightly lit restaurant. We were standing just inside the dining room doorway. I leaned up against a radiator, (once again I was cold) which wobbled. John warned me to be careful, in case the radiator broke off at the steam valve, or I'd be scaulded with steam.

(Comments from Zoom: Any interpretations from the Dream Team? I'd love an analysis...espesciallly about being cold and self-conscious. I'm not sure if this matters, but I take Deserel (an anti-depressant) to deepen my REM sleep after a day of Ritilin. They may want to comment on my med's as well.)

====== Commentary on: "Night of 3 Stars" by Narcissus ================

>I was at a party with Antonio Banderas and Teddy (the lawyer/Murder One). There were beautiful trendy people everywhere. I was

>travelling, so I only had travelling clothes with me....rather casual

>and schlumpy.

I'm struck here and throughout the dream by the fact that the

characters are not from the dreamer's everyday world, but rather are the "beautiful" people. If this were my dream, I'd ask myself how I could incorporate into my consciousness the beauty of the people I see in my dreams. I'd also ask how I could beauty in those around me.

>I remember feeling self conscious about everything, so I decided to

>make love to Teddy first.

I often feel self-conscious at parties myself. I hadn't consciously thought of this as an immediate solution to that problem (but I wish I had!). The dreammaker obviously knows what it wants and goes for it.

>He was so sensitive and thoughtful (and so HUGE) we had to make love

>sideways. Weird.

I'll say. It reminds me of the old jokes about oriental women. If this were my dream, I'd ask myself in what ways I couldn't take my pleasures straight on. Why are things kitty-cornered?

>The room was lit with candles and decorated with lots

>jewel tones and gauze. A fire was burning in the fireplace. Large

>french doors opened onto a second story balcony, it looked like one of

>the houses in New Orleans' French Quarter.

>Later, Antonio and I then went to a party. There was a long,

>freestanding, spiral staircase. At the center, a cellist

>and another woman were giving a performance. It was so cold that they

>decided to do a piece based on goose bumps, based on watching goose

>bumps bump. I was jealous till I found out that the (non cellist)

>performer, who looked lovingly at Antonio, was his sister.

If this were my dream, I'd ask myself whether I'm in love w/ someone

who's self-absorbed, who can't see me for focusing on his own anima.

>I remember waking up in Antonio's arms, nude, and tearing the room

>apart looking for my rings (wedding band and engagement ring


This, w/ the previous image, would lead me to ask about my relationship w/ my animus. Have I lost the inner ring, the connection w/ my animus? What is the state of the sacred marriage?

>Later that same night, John Travolta and I were going out to eat. No

>attraction, just two friends having dinner.

Interesting. Almost calls for an essay question: Compare and contrast Teddy, Antonio, and John. What are the relative attractions of each and why are you not attracted to John? What is the basis for friendships w/ men to whom you are not attracted?

>We were in a house converted into a brightly lit restaurant. We

>were standing just inside the dining room doorway. I leaned up

>against a radiator, (once again I was cold) which wobbled. John

>warned me to be careful, in case the radiator broke off at the steam

>valve, or I'd be scaulded with steam.

My friend is worried about my safety and recognizes how close I am to the heat that I don't even feel. If this were my dream, I would have buried anger or passion which I can't touch. John might be my guide to the warmth I'm looking for. I would use Gestalt techniques to dialogue w/ him and get his help.

I hope these thoughts are of use to you. Write if you wish to explore them further.


===Commentary on "Night of 3 Stars" by Flare===

What an intriguing dream.. I'm not too sure about this one, but since I have the time, I'll try and hash this one out as if it were my own.. There are some biases, of course, the first being that I am a woman and may miss some of the more interesting concepts of this dream. A sex-blind interpretation, if you will.

I am at a party with Antonio Banderas and Teddy( the lawyer/ Murder One). There are people here whom I would consider to be "beautiful, up to date, and trendy" everywhere at this party. They are so incredibly up there in society that I find myself at almost a total loss, standing amongst them.

They are trendy, I am not. They have this incredible position in life where they are set to remain for the rest of their lives; I don't ( indicated by the traveller's clothing). I am insecure around these people, knowing my own status in life, that I don't have the elite positions they do, I am not the same as them.

Here is where the dream breaks into two possible interpretations.. I was always a person to be straight up with everyone, so the two sides possible are: a heterosexual man in life with homosexual tendencies in the dream and a homosexual man in life with the same tendencies in the dream. If the dreamer is heterosexual, there are many possibilities. Explore the possibilities. How do you feel about the actors presented in the dream?

Are they the favorite actors of me or my mate? And what am I doing at a party with them? Why do I choose to make love with each of them, and why them out of the entire group of "trendy" people there? Is there a desire to BE each one of these men? How is my intimate relationship with my mategoing? Do I feel "insecure" about the way I make love to her, and wish that I could be more like these sexy stars of the screen that women drool over and secretly wish they could be with? Can I learn their secrets from them? Learn to be sensitive and thoughtful? Even though there are the possibilities of wonderful feeling and love making.. I am still cold. There is something wrong about this whole picture, which I can't place my finger on. Antonio's sister is at the next party I go to. I am jealous of the way she( and other women) looks at him until I realize their relationship. What can I learn from Antonio? What does he represent in my inner-most desires? Is he the pinnacle of all that I want to be? I get up, and realize that I have misplaced my wedding band and engagement ring. Time to go back to

reality? I rush to find them. Later, I decide go to a restaurant with yet another famous individual, John Travolta. We are sitting together enjoying conversation when I lean up against a radiator.. I am cold yet again! There is still something wrong here. He warns me about the radiator, and the fact that I could get "burned". What does this imply in my life? What am I afraid of getting burned from?

If the dreamer is homosexual, then.. What does each man represent to you? Again, what do you hope to learn from each of them? They are the role models of society, and there is much to learn from their success in life and love.

Why do you feel cold in the dream? Ask yourself honestly about your own love-life and relationships. I wish that I could interpret how the drugs interact with this dream, but since I am unfamiliar, I will not attempt to. Perhaps someone who knows can incorporate this dream with the possibility that it was influenced by the drugs. And as always, take this dream and get to know yourself a little better. There is much to learn about ourselves in the dream world that cross over into waking life..

==="He's Really, Really Mad at Me" by Flare===

Background info..: Just recently, I had a good talk with my friend Aaron( the same on in "I'm really really mad at you"). He has been having problems communicating with a good friend of ours( just happens to be Jason). I said some things last night when I talked to him that I probably shouldn't have. I told him that he was being prideful and that he needed to try harder to communicate with Jason and tell him how he feels. I don't think he reacted too well, he just stormed out of IHOP, where we had been studying.

The dream: It's late at night, later than usual for my dreams. I am walking through the parking structure to find my car. I am wearing a dark black shirt and red shirt. I pass many cars on the way to my car, one of which belongs to Aaron. The body of the car has been smashed on the front and left side of the car. It's a fairly new white car. Aaron is there, looking over the damage. I am instantly afraid upon seeing him. The trench coat appears as soon as I summon it. I think it shows up because I got nervous when I saw him. The coat is again swirling about me in a wind that I can feel this time, and it's cold. However, I notice that the air is not blowing through the structure. It seems to be just around me. Aaron looks up and sees me standing there, trenchcoat and all. He stands up and starts to accuse me of the damage done to his car. I notice that my car is parked right next to his, but on the wrong side to have done the damage. He is really mad. I can tell, because he has raised his voice to me. He never does that, and he told me before that he doesn't do that unless he's really mad. He is wearing a black t-shirt and light blue jeans. I also took note that he was wearing his contact lenses. He steps closer to me, and I instinctively back up. He has entered my "private space". He keeps advancing and I keep backing up. The wind that is only blowing around me is colder, and is now blowing around him also, that's how close he is. I begin to cry quietly, this is the first time I have done this in my dreams in a while. He sees the tears and stops yelling. He raises his hand as though to hit me and I start to cry more. He backs off, gets into his damaged car and drives off, leaving me standing in the dark structure by myself. The wind has stopped.


Subj: correction to "He's really, really mad at me"

Date: 95-11-15 08:21:04 EST

The shirt was black, I was wearing red jeans in the dream, not a black and red shirt.


===Commentary by Narcissus on "He's Really, Really Mad at Me" by Flare===

Once again, thanks for the background info. If I remember correctly, you had a romantic interest in Aaron which you hadn't expressed.

Background info..: Just recently, I had a good talk with my friend Aaron( the same on in "I'm really really mad at you"). He has been having problems communicating with a good friend of ours( just happens to be Jason). I said some things last night when I talked to him that I probably shouldn't have. I told him that he was being prideful and that he needed to try harder to communicate with Jason and tell him how he feels. I don't think he reacted too well, he just stormed out of IHOP, where we had been studying.

The dream: It's late at night, later than usual for my dreams. I am walking through the parking structure to find my car. I am wearing a dark black shirt and red jeans.

I read this as hiding myself above (the black shirt) while being

passionate below (the red jeans).

I pass many cars on the way to my car, one of which belongs to Aaron. The body of the car has been smashed on the front and left side of the car. It's a fairly new white car.

The left is often associated w/ the feminine. If this were my dream, Aaron would have exposed the white feminine side of himself in the recent conversation at the IHOP, only to feel that it was smashed frontally by the accusation of pride.

Aaron is there, looking over the damage. I am instantly

afraid upon seeing him. The trench coat appears as soon as I summon it. I think it shows up because I got nervous when I saw him. The coat is again swirling about me in a wind that I can feel this time, and it's cold. However, I notice that the air is not blowing through the structure. It seems to be just around me. Aaron looks up and sees me standing there, trenchcoat and all. He stands up and starts to accuse me of the damage done to his car. I notice that my car is parked right next to his, but on the wrong side to have done the damage. He is really mad. I can tell, because he has raised his voice to me. He never does that, and he told me before that he doesn't do that unless he's really mad. He is wearing a black t-shirt and light blue jeans. I also took note that he was wearing his contact lenses. He steps closer to me, and I instinctively back up. He has entered my "private space". He keeps advancing and I keep backing up. The wind that is only blowing around me is colder, and is now blowing around him also, that's how close he is. I begin to cry quietly, this is the first time I have done this in my dreams in a while. He sees the tears and stops yelling. He raises his hand as though to hit me and I start to cry more. He backs off, gets into his damaged car and drives off, leaving me standing in the dark structure by myself. The wind has stopped.

Aaron accuses me of breaking into his car. I'm not sure whether

I or Jason broke into it, but I am the one he's able to blame. My attraction for him, which I try to hide behind my trenchcoat, leaves me both hot and cold.

If this were my dream, I'd find a way to share w/ Aaron my confusion or try to make peace w/ the longing that he represents. What is incomplete in myself which I hope that he will fulfill? Why am I reluctant to tell him how I really feel? Is there a danger there which I haven't brought to consciousness?

All of these thoughts are projections, but I hope that they are of some use to you.


==="The Dark Side of the Moon" by Flare===

An interesting dream: there is no background for this one.

Once again, it is very dark outside. The moon is barely out and it's more a reddish-black moon than the one that we have all become accustomed to. I'm standing on an intersection on campus. I am wearing all black and am staring off into space, waiting for something. The time is about 3:30 am.

A black carriage comes down the street, a grayish cloud surrounding it. I can see two black horses in the front, drawing the carriage. There is a driver wearing a black cloak and top hat of some kind. Black gloves, and a black shirt underneath the black cloak. Everything seems to be moving in slow-motion. The black carriage stops in front of me. I feel extremely cold as the carriage comes to a stop. I pull my trenchcoat around me tighter to stay warm. The horses snort and paw the pavement. The driver and horses stare straight ahead.

Before too long, the carriage door opens and Aaron is inside, wearing a black tuxedo with a black shirt underneath and a bright blue cumberbun( that's the name of the belt that goes with a tux, right?) He is also wearing a black top hat that has a blue band around the bottom of the hat( not the rim). He carries a black cane with a gold tip. He is sitting down inside the carriage and is looking directly at me.

Suddenly, the black trenchcoat disappears and is replaced by a bright red formal gown. The gown is sleeveless and form-fitting. I am wearing a black choker necklace made of black lace with a pearl adorning the front. The cold feeling has disappeared. I get into the carriage and we begin to move forward slowly.

Next thing I know, we are at a formal ball, dancing ballroom style. The ballroom is beautiful! The walls are white with gold columns and the curtains are silver. The tables are placed around the dancing floor and have black and red table cloths on them( black on some and red on others). I feel edgy about this place, almost as though I don't belong here. The people at the ball are all wearing black, the women in black dresses, the men wearing the classic tuxedos with white shirt and black cumberbun.

We stick out as a couple, and people are staring at us and whispering quietly. We sit down at a table to have a glass of champagne. A man in a black tux and black cumberbun walks up to us, a hostile look on his face.

"Can I see your invitation?"

Aaron pulls a blood-red invitation out of an inner pocket in his tuxedo jacket. I can see the invitation is dripping red paint( blood?) onto the floor. A drop falls onto my shoe. It burns..

"See, now you've disturbed my date, " Aaron says. With one wave of his cane, the man disappears and so does the ballroom. We are at his home, wearing regular clothes. He is dressed in black jeans and a blue t-shirt with a multi-colored vest over the shirt. I am wearing blue jeans and a red shirt with black vest. He takes me into his arms in a hug, and slowly takes off my vest.

Before long, I'm lying in bed with him. We make love to each other slowly. As we lie in bed, in each others' arms, I fall asleep and wake up in real life.

===Commentary on The Dark Side Of The Moon" by Flare===

This dream disburbs me for several reasons. The black carriage was scary. I felt scared when I got into the carriage with Aaron. The ballroom, although it was beautiful, was dark at the same time. I knew that this wasn't right, something was terribly wrong. Aaron's attitude during the entire dream seemed all wrong also. He seemed very indifferent and cool until we got back to his place. The bed was black, I forgot to mention that. Even though I enjoyed the fantasy of being with Aaron, I knew that it was wrong. I woke up feeling guilty for having slept with him in my dreams.


==="THE KNOCK AT THE DOOR" by Abraxas===

It was late at night on a deserted stretch of highway. I was walking with Janet and Dawn, two women with whom I have had brief relationships. We were all stark naked! This was no big thing: in fact, none of us took any note of this. The night was dark and moonless. There were no street lights on this highway. We entered a building which in "real life" is an animal hospital. In my dream, however, it was my old college dormitory. As we entered the door, I noticed that the halls were dark also, except for two spotlights mounted on the sterile concrete walls. The light from these spotlights cast only a narrow beam onto the wall. Most of the building was still in darkness. The dividing line between light and darkness was well defined. I had come to see my old friend Jay, one of the few people who really noticed I was alive during those lonely years at the university.

I knocked at the dorm room door and Jay opened it. I felt pain and horror when I saw my old friend. He was dying-I had really come to say good-by. By the looks of him, I knew he really didn't have much time left to live. I threw my arms around him and cried and told him how sorry I was that this had to happen. I said that all the good people get called home early, and only the evil ones live long and prosperous lives. It just wasn't fair. We spent a few minutes in each other's arms while I stroked his black hair. Suddenly, I noticed Jay started to change. He looked like me. There were three moles on his face that corresponded to three on mine. I was embracing my mirror image.

It was time to leave. The girls and I found ourselves back on the rode again. I think they tried to comfort me somewhat. The scene changes and I am back my house again. Once more,there is no light. In the darkness, I wait for my "date" from the escort service. I am waiting for "IT" to happen. There is a knock at the door, and with a knot of fear in my stomach, I fling

the door open. What stands before me is not a voluptuous blond but a fat, misshapen hermaphrodite with brush straight hair. I can see both the front and back of this creature at the same time, and it looks like both a man and a women. It finally speaks and says" Hi! I'm your date from the escort service."

==="THE GOPHER IN HOMEROOM" by Abraxas===

I am sitting in my high school homeroom class a half a lifetime ago. The entire senior class held homeroom in the cafeteria together. In my dream, the cafeteria was dark except for spotlights on the wall. The beams from these lights pierced the darkness, but left most of the area unlighted. I was sitting alone at a table reading a book when I heard a thought in my head saying, "You better get out of the way because there's going to be a train coming through." Shure enough, the tiles in the floor began to fly up, like there was some enormous gopher tunneling right under the cafeteria. Something of unfathomable power was about to break through the floor. I don't know if I was able to get out of the way fast enough.

==="THE WOMAN AND THE TURK" by Abraxas===

Note: this is one from a couple of years ago, during the height of the Gulf War. It still intrigues me. I was a young teenager in this dream, but I also was detached enough to observe the drama unfolding from a third person perspective.

The scene was a mosque in Turkey. I have never been in a mosque before, but I knew this wasn't an ordinary mosque. There were pews like a Christian church that were finished in a very decadent fabric of deep red and purple. The walls were also a deep. almost blood red color. Bunches of blood red and lavender candles illuminated the space. Ornate chandeliers of dark red and purple candles hung from the ceiling.

This mosque must have been a whorehouse too. because my fifteen year old self saw a dark Turkish women wearing a white shirt and a long black dress She had long thick black hair and large silver earrings. The boy summoned up all of his courage and went up to the woman to proposition her. She said, "If you want me, go and ask the Turk." Then the boy noticed a muscular, dark Turkish man with a huge mustache standing near by. The boy lost his courage and said to forget it. He (I?) started for an open door, but the Turkish man stopped him with an animal scream. It froze the boy in his tracks. Outside, through an open door, I saw two B-52 bombers slowly circling the mosque in two concentric circles. I had the opinion that this was a force of

unfathomable power.



ISLAND COLLECTION I (Dreams of Christ)

(See Commentary section for introduction to this series of dreams- ED)

But before I do <share my dreams>, I would like to share the dream of a Coptic Christian and illegal alien who had left Egypt due to religious persecution:

"Healed on a Bed, Rising, Once Grounded" by Island's Friend

Dreamed Island and I are walking down the street. Island wears a white floor length wedding dress. A bald-headed man with his wife and two young daughters stop to talk to her. I leave to

go to a shop and talk with the owner. When I finish, I look for Island but she has disappeared. I see a large building of glass. I can see inside the various apartments.

I see Island sitting next to a 20-year-old boy who has a hurt foot, the right foot. Surgery is to be performed, but the boy is

very afraid. For the operation, the boy lies on a bed which rises to the ceiling like an elevator.

When the bed returns to the floor, the boy is healed. I never find Island after that. Then Christ is in white flowing robes and beckons me to follow him. I do and enter a church, and sit in a pew.

Christ sits facing me, on a throne, with a royal presence. He gives me a present, but I do not remember what the present is. (Mid-April 1983.)

COMMENTARY: Basically, this dream was dreamed during a period of time when I and dreamer had an intimate relationship while I was teaching him English over some months. At that time in my life, this person was the most "spiritual" person I had ever met. In retrospect, what seemed "spiritual" may have been more a function of socialization. Yet his dream is very interesting to me now. First of all, he has us walking down the street, something we did at the time, but wearing a white wedding dress. Perhaps he intuited I entertained thoughts of marriage, which I did at the time. His dream alludes to a bald-headed man. His brother was bald-headed who was married to a woman who had no children or sisters at the time. Perhaps the two young daughters actually refer to her and myself, for we were close friends. He reports leaving me to go to a shop to talk with the owner. In fact several months later he indeed does go talk to the owner of a sho

p, whom he marries almost immediately thereafter. He phoned me some time later, but I was unavailable. The large building he refers to I have no idea, but the fact that a boy of 20 lies

on a bed which rises to the ceiling like an elevator is transparent. There was a loft bed in my apartment. And he, though older, was like a 20-year-old in comparison to other men his age. When our relationship ends, the dream suggests the boy is healed. Actually his problem at the time was loss of esteem, for in his country, being wealthy, he was held in and high esteem, though his religion made him feel an outcast. When he came to the US, he could not get over the treatment by others -- like he was dirt under their feet. I believe it impeded his progress. The healing referred to may have been because I did not treat him like dirt. I didn't actually see an Illegal Alien and Pauper from Egypt Who Espoused The Wrong Religion. I do not know what happened to him. But the dream does suggest a future direction.

I bring up this dream because it seems more transparent to me than my own dreams. Perhaps it is a function of that fact that a speaker of Arabic could only use stripped down language to translate the dream to a speaker of English. To me his dream is a "spiritual" dream , whereas mine can only be interpreted using a psychological model, with the distinction "spiritual" perhaps (and perhaps not) being applied. And just the labyrinthine directions alone that my dreams seem to unfold in make the process a complex, and not, transparent one, probably because my

filters need a hell of alot of cleansing.

Recently I read an excellent book, Realities of the Dreaming Mind by Swami Sivananda Radha (Timeless Books, 1994), where she poses questions, following her dream "Receiving the Mantle" (see her comments on the dream). I ask, what distinctions really can be made in a realm where distinctions are an oxymoron? What does "spiritual" mean?

I have included all dreams except for the last one (1995) that I have on computer which contain any reference to Christ or Jesus -- relatively very few (.0004%) -- and i nvite any comment from

the sublime to the ridiculous, from the sacred to the profane. Some months back I had pulled these out, I forget why, and briefly interpreted portions from them in the context of my life. I am hoping that comments from other(s) will expand my thinking a bit, however.

Dream Sequence of Christ by Island

"Indians Masked As Fish Are Missed During Target Practice in Water"

Dream I am on a ship looking out into water and have successfully finished a kind of target practice in the water. Now the real test comes. A beautifully multicolored school of fish surface;

however, they are a disguise for Indians who have used the fish as masks.

I draw my bow and arrow and proceed to shoot but do not kill the fish and miss the mark. I add a white candle in the shape of the image of Christ's head to the altar. It is not blessed. When lit, the wick droops, and the flame is very low. (March 1982.)

"A 20th Century Christ Crucified in the Mid-West"

Dream of history repeating itself in the 20th century with the crucifixion of a Christ-like figure in the midwest and the murderer beside him. (May 1985.)

"In The Deeps of OuterSpace I Free Myself From A Snake"

[A nightmare]

Dream I am lying in wait on a beach of an ocean. The pregn

ant stillness is electric with the energy of a countdown for a take-off. Many aircraft constituting a host are in readiness.

We fly in the air. I, however, am not caged in metal. I find myself drifting in space. The sensation is utterly new; I am alone and drifting in this vast, immeasurable space.

At first, there is pleasure at being a part of this host, but then, an icy fear settles in at the realization that I am really

separate and floating. Soon I must die. I hit the water and drown. A new sensation fills me, one of the acute awareness that I am dying, and no one will save me. I continue to drop level after level and know I will hit the bottom of the ocean floor. I think and feel through the experience, remaining calm. A snake attaches itself to my body, wrapping itself around me in a circular fashion. It painfully sears my flesh. This is to be expected. I calmly and slowly proceed to free myself from the snake. When I settle at the bottom of the ocean, I have the urge to talk to Christ. He and I have a conversation, primarily consisting of my telling him of my devotion and loyalty to

him. (January 1986.)

"In An Elevator Doing A FreeFall At The Speed of Light"

Dream a nightmare where I get into an elevator and, as I hit the basement, I am to go up so I punch a button. Then I remember I must dump garbage. So I punch the button, changing signals

midstream. The elevator is confused. Suddenly it detaches itself, and a free floating descent begins. The feeling is too real! I have this growing sense of being inside something alienated and

longing for something or someone at the same time. Rapidly moving away from any other life force. Then I become aware of a tremendous space surrounding the elevator.

I continue to drop -- like lightening -- the churning in my stomach lets me know I will not be saved from this one. Rock

bottom ground seems imminent. I know I am about to crash, and then death.

Yet it seems like it's taking forever to get to rock bottom even while travelling at the speed of light. I think, "What to

do?" I imagine myself crying out for help but no one will hear me. Even if they did hear my cry, they would be powerless to do anything. I call out to Christ two times, very softly -- "Christ.

Christ." At that moment I wake up before crashing. (September 1987.)

"Climbing, Climbing, Climbing, Crash"

Dream of calling L_. I come to a huge building, seems to take up a block. An abandoned church, school, with several platforms attached to the side. The wide world stretches around the building.

You can see forever. Sky, mountains, valleys, trees. Though the building is out in the open, I climb up on one low platform, testing it, but am not satisfied. I move to the next, a little higher, still not satisfied. I go to the end, or edge, of the building and see a high platform to my liking. I climb up it. When I am at the top, I see that it is no longer attached t

o the building. My weight alone will cause it to crash. I see it slowly crashing to the ground and me with it, and imagine my

bones being crushed. I pray to Jesus to protect my bones before I hit ground. (March 1988.)

"My Father Introduces The Astrologer"

Dream I wake up in a state of extreme agitation having a dream image between sleep and waking. I am lying on a bed as Christ on a crucifix. Thrown over me is a spider's web or fisherman's net which is symbolic of the zodiac (feet, nadir; head, Midhe aven; arms, descendent and ascendent), and I am trying to extricate myself by coming out, coming through. It is as if I am smothering to death. I'm in a huge old room with the astrologer I'm to see on the 27th. We both lie in a big bed. He is on my left. I do not make out his physical appearance. There is a tall narrow window next to me. He initiates the conversation, but I do all the talking. I talk a lot about myself. Then I become self-conscious and remark to him that I am paying him more to talk about me than vice versa. I sense that the design of the talk is therapeutic. Finally we hold each other and kiss. Somewhat cocksure, I address what we're becoming or to become. I get up and go to a baby's crib behind the bed. It is off in the dark although the room itself is rather dark.

There is a tiny baby there, but it is his baby and not mine. It appears that the baby is wet and hungry. I wash baby in a tub. He enjoys this and experiences the freedom, the leisure, and play of the moment. I wash baby again. This time I stand before a basin. I can not really regulate the temperature and the water goes in a thin stream on baby's face and eyes. The basin is small; too constraining an environment for baby to play. Baby is so tiny that he fits into the palm of my hand. He allows me to handle him with ease, but he squints his eyes and screws up his face when the water hits him. I became extremely aware of his discomfort. I'm to meet the astrologer again, and I think, "will he even be there?" I've left him waiting a long time. There is a sense of panic that he may have come and gone. I think I put baby away and leave him to his own devices as we round the bottom of the stairs leading to my parents' home. It is the kind of stairs usually seen in large, old apartment buildings, and this was clearly the back entrance which is not usually trafficked. Before I ascend, a feeling overpowers me. It is as if I step into a realm without visible boundaries or clear demarcation, and the only way I'm aware of it is through the feeling.

The movement inside this realm might be accompanied by a very subtle wind, vibration, or chill which would serve as the only visceral sign. The feeling is one of great fear, even terror, and I do my best to intuit the source to no avail. If I had to find a name for it, I would call it evil. I expect a robber. I think, "Will the astrologer abandon me because of baby? But baby's not mine. I'll tell him I'm bringing up baby for U_, and she's 43. Won't he be proud of me. But he might not care. I'll wait till he asks about baby. He might not want to assume the responsibility." The astrologer is there when I arrive. But now I see he's black. Why did I not see this before? How

could he have kissed me without my seeing this? Daddy won't like him, I think. U_ appears as in a mirage. I tell her that I might be HIV positive. She then tells others, I think my family. She enters a classroom to teach. There is perhaps another teacher there. I stand at the rear of the classroom like a proselytizing radical about the ideals of loyalty and their perversions: Treachery, betrayal and the like. I have the force of truth and righteousness behind me, and I know it. U_ is stunned. But the astrologer is having a brief talk with my father. I perceive that the astrologer is brilliant, marching to the tune of a different drummer when growing up. This pleased my father to no end because it is as if he remains connected to higher thought/spirit even though he is perceived by others as "strange". His upbringing was obscure. The astrologer, and one of my brothers -- either the oldest or youngest -- and myself head outdoors. Tis a yard which is adjacent to a much larger field. A very low shrub bush line separates the two areas. He wants us all to play together and explains the game he has in mind in terms of a complicated strategic maneuver. Though I agree to play, I do so to please the astrologer. The thought of playing the game makes me weary and sad. So I started off by crouching with baby in the bushes and dropping out of the game early on. Baby has a hard time. I wait for a bird to fly up and catch a quick glimpse of one though the glimpse may have only been in my imagination the movement was so fleeting. I could not comprehend the meaning of the astrologer being black. About this time, a male friend of the astrologer's appears unexpectedly. He is looking for him. I see that the astrologer's game has led him to the bottom of long, narrow steps. There are only three or four before you reach the ground floor of a building. They stretch the length of the building. The only thing is hiding in the shrub bush my gaze could not take in what kind of building it was -- a schoolhouse, I think, though it could have been a church, an assembly hall, or a courthouse just as well. I see the astrologer on the steps. His friend follows suit. We leave the astrologer and his friend and return home. My father was in the middle of expounding upon the astrologer's many virtues to my brothers. This includes a story of how he attends a military ceremony of sorts where some real big whigs are, and a doctor approaches him and tries to trap him like a sophist.

His intent is to make a fool of him, and he phrases a remark loaded with intellectual content rather blithely, prefacing the remark with "so you assume that . ... " followed by a scientific truth (i.e.,he utters a profound statement that contains the germ of a lie). The astrologer bluntly responds,"I don't assume anything on earth." When Daddy was told that the astrologer's friend had arrived, he hauls off in his car to find him and make sure that the two connect. And I think, isn't that

wonderful of Daddy! How concerned that the astrologer's friend had his car to find him and make sure And I think, isn't that wonderful of Daddy! How concerned and conscientious he is. (July

26, 1988)

"The Power of Evil"

Dream a very long and involved dream about P_R_ and her family. The striking feature of the dream is the total permeation of the feeling and nature of evil, so that the dream ends up a

nightmare. First of all I visit her. She is conducting her card reading business except her storefront is actually a huge building with different levels, including a basement, and alcoves. I am holding a pair of twin children, boy and girl. No more than two years old, both elegantly dressed. They suck me so hard on my breasts and under my arm pits that they seem like leeches.

They cannot get enough. Relatives mill in and out, including R_'s daughters. There is a bed in one of the raised rooms. I am shocked to see R_ climb in and perform sexual acts in front of even her children and myself and without thinking anything of it. I want to run. The man stands up at one point, his penis falling out of a hole in his underwear. It is a lewd scene, and I leave. I enter a room, believing that I will find escape or release here. In the room are many objects used for ritual magic, including religious icons. The feeling of evil becomes even more intense, and I feel I am suffocating. Upstairs I believe the party is still going on. I call out to P_ R_, I believe hoping

to be saved from this room, but I am ignored. Somehow I manage to stumble out and ghostly figures of evil scurry past me, seeking me out. I am now underground in a very large area like a basement except it is bare. I am paralyzed and cannot move. Fixed to the spot. In terror. I call out "help me" many times, and find it almost impossible to utter the words. I think of Christ and at that moment I wake up to the sound of my voice in bed screaming out, "Help me!" (September 1988.)

"Is It A Man, Is It An Angel, Is It Christ Crucified?"

Something about Memorial. I overhear a conversation between D_ and V_ B_ or K_ regarding her getting a sizeable raise. I realize they are exploiting me. Then I enter a photo shop looking for a specific camera, one that takes pictures of my abstract surrealistic drawings up real close. A man tries to sell me a camera. It is rather inexpensive, $99, but he claims it will do the job. He is very seductive and seems enamored of me. I am delighted by his gracious and magnanimous manner; in fact, surprised to be on the receiving end. Yet I want to see

the end product. Hebrings up in conversation a woman, a part of a couple, who live next door, I believe. She does these beautiful drawings. He pulls them out and begins to show them to me. I am very impressed. They have a Japanese quality but with a decidedly Western influence. The drawing he shows me takes in an entire landscape on a wide canvas, like a mural, in bold color. I see a man, or an angel, hovering in the air over waters. I see the muscular sinews in his legs and admire the artist's ability to capture this detail in a spiritual being. It is as if he is arching forward. Had he been hanging? Was this the crucified Christ, now ascending? Is he embracing the world? Does this forward arch show his protective love for humanity? On the far right of the drawing paper, there is a portion drawn in black and white but not painted as if this were a work in progress. I ask the guy the materials the artist uses. But the camera is still the business of the day. Next he shows me several photos. Each is beautiful and he is awed by them. His

voice takes on a hushed quality as he extols their virtues. There is one photo of 3 people, almost specters or shadows they are so dim, and yet the camera has caught them in three dimensions. I am not impressed nor convinced. He has not demonstrated to me this camera for the specific purpose I had in mind. He writes up the cost for the camera. Nearly six hundred dollars. I am shocked. Then the glamour falls away from the entire exchange. Now we are doing strictly business. And I am talking heatedly with him. I am very difficult to convince. (April 1989.)

"How The Aquarian Gospel Came To Be"

Dreamed, remembering only a part of a lengthy dream, where I look at a book that is like the Aquarian Gospel. I am being told that this book is written by Christ, explaining how he saw the world around him from a very intimate and inner point of view. It is beautiful. I show the book to T_ G_ who is very excited to read it. (December 1990.)

"An Embarrassing Proclamation From Someone Who Never Gives Up"

Dreamed Rob, Linda Disharoon, another male, and myself are going on a trip on the spur of the moment. Everyone is ready to go without preparation. I think of many things I need, or should do. I see myself deliberately putting off leaving on this trip. The reasons are obscure to everyone but myself. Suddenly Daddy in his full glory, with his smile and personality intact, stands in the middle of the street, proclaiming, "Christ is still going to save

you!" The sense is that, even though I delay, Christ will save me. I'm embarrassed. I look around and say to everyone, "He

[Daddy] never gives up. He always keeps trying." (July 1991.)

"The Problem Of How To Feed 450 Black Men On the Spur Of The Moment"

Dreamed while napping that I'm at a function that seems to be in a caved out area underground in the deep woods, with many girls from highschool. One is a collector, or keeper of the coins -- perhaps P_. I_ decides she wants a particular kind of import

ed beer. I ask if anyone wanted any beer, and I would go to the store and get some. All she wants is a six-pack that can be

shared among us. I go to P_, the keeper of the change, or coins. I ask her for money for a six-pack. Could be that I_ is keeping the coins while P_ wants the beer. P_ divies out the money.

I have this note, an IOU. She's stingy and withholding. I have to ask her for it separately, explaining I need that too. She's engaged in conversation with someone else. She forgets about me

altogether. I leave. I run into Rt_[husband]. They ask him at work to attend this grand weekend function. He's going by himself. I'm not included in the invite, though it may be implicit that I am to go. Yet he accepts, and I'm not going. I become hysterical. I see him call and cancel altogether,

rather than to ask for me to come along. Grace Christ looks at me and tells me that I have to feed 450 black men in an auditorium. The time is 7:15pm. I say, "You didn't tell me that before." She swears she did. I explain to someone else, perhaps R_, how meticulous I am about putting things on a calendar. I go into the auditorium. R_ appears briefly. He hears the black men from rough parts of the country. R_ leaves me alone with them. I expect to find food there to prepare. The lecture they are to see begins at 7:30pm. I think of whipping something up in 15 minutes. All I have to cook with are a few wilted carrots and other leftover items. No way for it to stretch. I get panicky. I say, "They break at 9 o'clock. Maybe I can quickly get something together before then. Maybe they won't be ravishing with hunger." As I am leaving, I ask a black man if he has a girlfriend. He looks at me strangely. "Yes." I stumble and hesitate. It seems as if he's coming on to me. I explain, "I am just trying to clarify for myself if you really need the food or not." He said,"Yes, indeed, I do." I realize I must get on the move. I leave. I want to

go to the grocery store,just around the corner. Yet there is nothing to buy that can feed and sustain these people. Aunt J_ pulls up. I hear her voice. She's calling me. I explain my predicament. She says, "There's a store about three blocks away." I hope she will volunteer to take me. She does.

In the meantime, she stops at a deli to get meats and cheeses that roll up, you eat them, and they're delicious. The platter is piled with thinly, finely sliced meats and cheeses. I say, "This is ideal. I'll put it up there. They'll just walk up and eat it. She sits there, rolls it up, and eats in front of me. I'm in a panic to get there by 7:30 to feed all these people. Secondly, she doesn't actually move to take me to the grocery store. I sit there. Then I realize I haven't even brought these girls their beer. Then I think, "Is this what is meant by the parable, where the multitudes are fed with the fish and bread? It takes faith?" I think, "Maybe I'm supposed to have a lot of faith, and then it'll happen." (August 1991.)

"Will The Authentic Christ Please Stand Up?"

Dreamed a vivid and greatly detailed dream, much of which I do not recall.

I go over to a school or department of NYU early one morning, as early as 6 o'clock. One of the women who works there is already on duty. I'm shocked. Why are people there so early? She claims, "I really love my work." I sit down among annuals. One is 1981. I look through and see all these hand drawn pictures of all the events taking place that year. It made the annual quite unusual and innovative in design. I had never seen anything like it, with page after page of drawings by hand. I believe R_ is with me as I look around the corner into a huge room where others are mingling. T_ C_ pops into the dream. I am writing something and show it to him, some creative work I'm proud of. He admires it. I am smug about it, as if I know it's really THE thing. Mary S_ [a former nun] appears. Judy [also a former nun], comments, "Mary seeks out Presidents of Universities and Companies to carry on mundane business." The other Mary [Lamb_, part of actual name] says,"This is the kind of Christ that Mary [S_] follows. Addressing me, she continues, "Please look at the authentic Christ." I see Christ's words in a ZyIndex format, only each word has its own significance. She goes through page after page of words. Every time I look at a word, I see a radically different Christ than any followed today. I realize that we do not follow Christ. We follow only our projections. As she goes rapidly through them, I want to linger over each one, eagerly and hungrily, trying to absorb them. One interesting thing is, everyone in the dream names herself "Mary." (October 1991)

"A Gift of Two Tiny Miniatures"

Dreamed my family [R_, A, and I] are in Florida. We drive off one night, coming upon this huge lake. R_ and A_ decide to swim in it, only it's pitch dark. When they both enter the lake, I can

barely make them out at first. Then I cannot see them anymore because it is so dark. I am frightened.I call out to them. As I stand near the lake, suddenly I wheel around on one of my feet in circles. As I wheel in circles, the rain pelts down. This action brings them out of the lake. It rains. Then I think of a telephone conversation I have with Mother earlier. I had asked her how my oldest brother was. She says, "He's always E_. But he's still there. Thank God he isn't with me." As soon as I stop spinning around in the rain, there's E_ by my side.

He's actually come all the way to Florida and has somehow managed to find us. We're at a place similar to Alligator Point, like nowhere land. Yet there he is. So I'm very upset with him for doing this, but I don't show it. R_ is very upset. He expects me to display my anger, but I don't.

What can one say or do? I ask E_, "Where are you staying?" He responds, "I don't know." I say, "When are you going back?" And he says, "Tomorrow." Then he tries to let me know that he couldn't take it, with all the screaming and everything. I gave him two gifts. Tiny miniatures. I pull them, I think, off of a shelf. One has to do with not smoking. He laughs, keeping the gift. The other gift is very intricate, and tiny. It's a tiny miniature velvet book which has to do with putting these little icons in the right places as you make the book. It is Christian. Has to do with Christ, the scriptures. When I give it to him, however, it is too confusing, I don't have a chance, actually to put the icons in the right place. I cannot figure it out. It's marked like L8 to M7, and M8 to -- you have to really work with it. He takes it without the scriptures being in place. So we pull up -- other children, very tiny children, besides A_, are with us -- and I say, "R_, what are we doing here? I thought we were staying elsewhere." R_ says, "No, when we come to this part, we get us another room.

"It just so happens that there's an additional room so that E_ can stay in it. I don't know if we have to pay extra for it or what, but it's just a way of accommodating him, which I think is most unusual because I am envisioning E_ piling in upon us. Then I find old books and ropes? Very rare old books. I'm so taken with one that I stand and xerox page after page after page. Basically it's these drawings: tarot card drawings. Then beautiful animals. I am amazed. Unfortunately I was only able to xerox one side, missing the other side. So I am upset that I don't get all of them done. I think that they will come out in color, but they don't. They come out in black and white. I look at R_ and say, "Do you see? Here is a man like Yeats who found symbols in everything. He finds meaning everywhere." R_ doesn't think too much of it. (January 1992)




"I'm With The Band" by Nutcracker

I was in a bar when I noticed Bono and the rest of the band (U2) come in. I brushed my auburn hair which was long and silky. Bono came up to us (me and the guy I was with). Bono's hair was curly, not straight like it normally is, and needed to be washed. He asked us, "Which of you wants to listen to our new album (we both did) before it's released?" I was the one who stuck my hand out for it and said, "I do." Bono put a cassette in my hand and I put it in my Walkman and listened to it. I loved the first song. I was sitting there just 'rocking away'. I took off the headphones for a minute, and I must have had the volume up too loud because my ears were ringing. The Edge said, "Here, make yourself a copy," to which my friend said, "Yeah, make me one too." He then gave me all the equipment needed to duplicate the tape, all except for the blank tape itself. Then the band said I had till the following afternoon to finish copying the tape and return it to them in their hotel room. I jumped in my car and drove home. I thought I had blank tapes there, but was mistaken. No such luck. I jumped back into the car, putting the tape in to listen to on the way. What is this bullshit? Bono was singing Frank Sinatra type songs. I really must tell him tomorrow, "Look, if you want to emulate Frank, that's all fine and well, but do it on a separate album, not on a rock and roll album. Not everyone's as enamored of Frank Sinatra as you are." I stopped off at a bar where two of my friends were working. I tell them what's happened and now they want copies too. I told them I had to go. "I have to buy some tapes or I won't get these done in time." (10/22/95)

"Death By Plastic Wrap" by Nutcracker

It was late at night and I had gone to see a friend. When I got to her house, there were dozens of people standing out in the street. There didn't appear to be a fire or anything. She wasn't home, so I let myself in. A while later I looked out the window and saw my friend. I looked for my shoes and by the time I found them, she had gotten in her car and driven off. The crowd had disappeared. Her neighbor, Mary, was walking into her house. "Mary," I called to her, "what happened?" I didn't quite make out what she said, but it was something about someone's husband (my friend's?) being found dead, wrapped in an industrial size roll of plastic wrap. The next day I found out that it was Mary's husband who had died and that he had been missing for a month. (10/22/95)

"Chickbunnies" by Nutcracker

I wanted to visit my friend's mother, but couldn't remember which house was hers. I knew the street, but not the house number. I must have found her because I was now in her house and she was showing me some chickbunnies. They were teeny-tiny rabbits that came in eggs and then would hop out of their shells. They were adorable. (10/22/95)

"Computers R Us" by Nutcracker

I was taking a computer class and there were four other people in the class with me. There was an instructor, but it was a 'learn at your own' pace situation. It seemed every time I looked up from my computer, everyone else would be taking a break, and several of the others would clear their screens or make it show only numbers so you couldn't see what they were working on. During the last break of the day I went into the locker room. It was a disaster. I said to no one in particular, "It must be raining out." There were jackets, boots and umbrellas strewn across the entire room. (10/24/95)

"Cold As Stone" by Nutcracker

Dream Fragment: I was outside late at night and the gargoyles had come to life and were chasing me. When they caught me and grabbed me, even though now alive, they still felt as cold as stone. (10/24/95)

"The Two Liz's" by Nutcracker

I was sitting, I believe, in an airline terminal when Larry Fortensky, Liz Taylor and her mother came in. Larry was playing a game of pool and all of the women were making passes at him. Liz looked great. She was wearing an emerald green ski outfit and was very slim. Her mother needed a walker to get around. I asked the receptionist to sneak a picture of Liz for me, unknowingly. Now we're all eating and I see Elizabeth Hurley (model) there as well. She's wearing a canary yellow suit and is most striking. I ask her if I can take a picture of her after dinner and she agrees. I go to my sister's and ask to borrow her camera. On the way back, I drop the camera and it breaks into two pieces. I try several times to fit the front piece back over the lens. It has an air filled plastic bag with a one inch square piece of foam rubber with a small circle cut out of it in the middle. This has to fit exactly over the lens to allow the light in. I get it reassembled and by the time I get back, everyone's finished eating. Elizabeth has changed clothes and is now wearing a red dress with gold veins running through it. I ask her if she's ready to pose for me. We move away from the table and just as I'm ready to shoot, my niece sits on her lap. "Elizabeth, do you mind? "Not at all." I take a picture of the two of them and try again for a shot of her by herself. Then my other niece wants her picture taken with her too. Ok, one more time. Finally, for my last shot. I'm trying to focus, but the light keeps fading in and out; one minute it's too bright and the next, not bright enough. I take a picture, but the flash doesn't go off. I turn on the light on the table behind me, now it's too bright. I turn it off; too dark. Now the lens seems to be working properly again. I snap the shutter, not realizing that Elizabeth is now dressed in full clown garb with makeup and you won't be able to tell who it is in the picture. I tell my sister about the problems with her camera and she mentions something about having 'worked' on it herself. I said, "You can't do that. You need to take it to a professional." (10/25/95)

===== Dream: 'Deja Vu' by Nutcracker =====

My friend Rachel and I were driving along on our way to Dallas when we passed by my friend Nancy's house. The garage door was open so I turned into the driveway and pulled inside. Hmmm. All five of their cars were home. And when did they get that VW Beetle? That meant Jamie was home too. Why hadn't he gone to work? I asked Rachel, "Are you sure I haven't brought you here before?" She shook her head no. Just then a side door to the garage opened and Nancy came in. She was carrying a long black velvet jacket. She seemed startled to see us there. (10/31/95)

===== Dream: 'If I Had A Hammer' by Nutcracker =====

I was outside talking to Noam who was working underneath his car. His daughter Hadas was standing between his car and mine, swinging a hammer. I grabbed her arm just as she was about to hit my car with it. Her father scolded her saying, "If you hit her car, I'll have to give her mine just to pay for the damages." As I sat there on the ground, my left foot began aching. I took my shoe off and then pulled my sock down. I had gotten a nail in my foot several weeks before and it just now began hurting. The nail was up near my ankle; in the bony part of the foot. I moved the skin back and forth over the nail, trying to match the hole up so I could poke the nail back through it. I almost had it. The skin hadn't quite healed shut yet and was still discolored. I thought, "If I could just line the two up, I could take the hammer and rip the nail out of my foot. (11/1/95)

===== Dream: 'The Boys Club' by Nutcracker =====

The guys had built a clubhouse just for themselves, which us girls promptly crashed. Upstairs, the guys were playing cards. Felicia (Kristina Wagner/GH) and I were sitting on a bed, talking. For some reason she began searching under the covers and discovered the guy's money that I had hidden there. She started pulling it all out and putting it on top the covers. "Put that back. We don't want them to know where the money is," I said. We hid the money again and as we sat there talking, the police raided the place. They searched the bed for money (we were sitting on it), but they could find nothing. Then they arrested everyone, putting us all in handcuffs and leg irons. I wondered if they were going to strip search us too. They took us all out into the hallway and made us sit on the floor. Nine of the women broke a window and escaped on horses. I said to Gail, "They'll never make it to Paris. Not without a fake passport." She replied, "Susie will. She used to live there." I don't know why they didn't release us - we hadn't done anything wrong. They did take off the handcuffs and leg irons so we could sit at the bar. Some of the women had been caught and would now have to serve twice as much time. (11/02/95)

===== Dream: 'Noise, Noise, Noise' by Nutcracker =====

I had gone outside to see what all the commotion was. It turns out, someone was building houses on either side of mine. They towered above me. I heard one guy saying they had used wood on the exterior instead of brick so that the price would be lower and wouldn't raise property values. I walked around to the back yard. My entire lawn had been cemented over. Now while everyone elses yards were covered in leaves, mine was bare cement. I liked more raking for me. I thought to myself that I needed to get some roller blades. This is going to be great! (11/02/95)

===== Dream: 'Dream Students' by Nutcracker =====

I had gone over to my friend Barb's house. She was in the kitchen writing.'Here, read this," she said, pushing her paper towards me. Everything was disjointed. There was no sentence structure. I said to her, "This would make a great dream, but you need to re-write it." Then her sister Cindy joined us. Soon they were both sitting there, trying to put their dreams to paper. I looked at Cindy's - it looked too much like a form you would fill out at say, a doctor's office. She had columns with dates, times, names, places and what happened. "That's fine for getting your details in order," I said, "but now put it into story form." Barb and I then went outside. She needed to put her car in the garage. The hood of the car was up and she couldn't see, so I looked out my side window and gave her directions. At the same time, her dad was pulling out of the garage in my red Datsun. "Go forward," I said to her. Then I'd yell, "STOP." "Ok, go forward. STOP," I'd yell again. We were thisclose to hitting my car. I had wanted her to go in reverse, but for some reason the word escaped me. (11/02/95)

===Lucid OOBE Dream: 'Darwin's Theory' by Nutcracker===

I had gone somewhere (to someone's house?) and was attacked by a capuchin monkey. As I entered the room, the monkey jumped on me, knocking me to the ground. Even though I knew I was asleep, my body became stiff and I couldn't move. I could feel all of the hair on my body standing on end, my heart racing, I was terrified. I felt this had to do with my making judgment calls, as if the monkey was less of a person than myself. i.e. I am the monkey...the monkey is my former self. An out of body experience that though I couldn't *see* myself, I felt I was *above* myself and in my minds eye, felt like a mummy (tightly wrapped), perhaps suffocating? (11/7/95)

"Beatles Song: Coke Above My Head' by Nutcracker

(Dream fragments) I had been out with my friend Gail. Upon returning home, I then retreated to my bedroom, closing the door behind me. I had this nagging feeling I was supposed to be somewhere else or doing something, that someone was waiting for me. Instead, I crawled into bed and I had a bottle of Coke with me. [Lyrics: Crawled in bed, with a coke above my head] I set the bottle above me, on top of the arched headboard. Then fearing I would knock it down as I slept, and it would fall, smashing me in the face, I moved it, placing it alongside me on the bed, to my left. The cap was loose and some of it spilled onto the blanket. I brushed a few of the drops away with my hand and then snuggling under the covers, I fell asleep.

[ ] indicates lyrics sung to the Beatles song: ? off the Magical Mystery Tour Album? {found my coat, grabbed my hat, made the bus in seconds flat} (11/7/95)

"PEZ HEAD" by Nutcracker

I was in an antique shop when I spotted a box with some very old PEZ dispensers in it. There were four altogether. Three of the items were guns of sorts (laser/space, real) while the fourth was of a construction crane. I didn't know the prices on them, but took the box to the counter and told the cashier I'd take them all. While I'm thinking that they're probably hundreds of dollars apiece, the lady says, "That'll be $1.31 each." Maybe she didn't realize their full value. (11/6/95)

"Save It To The Hard Drive" by Nutcracker

I had had several dreams one night, but instead of getting up to write them down, I telepathically saved them to the hard drive of my computer. 11/6/95)

(COMMENTS by Nutcracker: I wish! I shudder to think of all the dreams fallen by the wayside by my ambivalence to wake myself up and write them down. I've broken out of the habit and it's hard to get back into)

"Screwed Again!" by Nutcracker

It was late at night. I was in a car with this guy and his girlfriend. We were in a gas station parking lot, watching some mini-series that I had taped. We were well into the fifth hour of it when the tape started rewinding. I checked the tape. It was at the end. "We're missing the last hour," I said to the girl. We then checked the tv listing in the paper. They had put the last hour of the series on a different channel. (11/8/95)

"Evil Incarnate" by Nutcracker

I was hanging out with this guy I knew at his place of business. It was after hours and the store was closed. In the store's front display window were some animals. We crawled in to play with them. It was dark inside and out, so no one could see us. As we lay there, I began to think about making love to him right there in the window. Would anyone be able to see us? Did they have an infrared camera aimed at us? Next we're in a restaurant. It's very dimly lit and I guess it would really be called a 'greasy spoon'. The guy I came with is no longer with me, but I did run into a female acquaintance. She left to go use the restroom and this tall, fat guy sat down next to me. He spoke in a low, deep voice and I couldn't see his face as it was obscured by the darkness of the restaurant. He wanted to know where the girl who was with me went. I said she had left, but that wasn't a good enough answer to please him.

This man was evil..I could feel it. Next thing I know he's got his fingernails, which are razor blades, dug into the small of my back, jabbing me. Then he lifts me up on them with one fist, raising me into the air. I slowly slide down the razors, but I don't cry out in pain, because that's what he wants. The pain is exquisite, so painful that it almost becomes pleasure. I try to block out the pain. I think of my body as frozen - numb to the pain, as I hang there, not unlike Christ on the cross. Then he releases me and tells me to go find the girl for him. As I leave the table, I wonder how much blood is on the back of my shirt. I wander through the restaurant, past the kitchen. Waitresses stand around adjusting their black nylons. I come across a secret room in the back. I feel like I'm in an episode of Twin Peaks...secret doors and strange little people everywhere. It is so bizarre. I stop and sit in a booth where several people are eating. Next I find myself in a movie theatre. The tall fat guy has found me again. I lean over to tell him that I couldn't find the girl. He snaps my neck to the right, killing me. (11/9/95)

"What Does It Mean?" by Nutcracker

(not a dream per se) but I see a green colored continuous sheet of paper with thousands of letters and symbols scrolling past my eyes. (n - nose, e -eyes, t - tree, etc.) (11/9/95)






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